Wow, Seeking, that's wild that you had a really bad episode when doing a merkaba meditation - I think that makes sense.
At one point I was trying to do the Drunvalo videos and imagine the merkaba and so forth around me, but I never felt it "click" and it didn't really resonate with me so I abandoned it.
I did have a shamanic encounter with Thoth during that period, who was supposedly once of Drunvalo's teachers. It was a very interesting and personal vision that was very helpful to me at the time. Thoth was a very mysterious figure though and I didn't warm up to him and didn't seek any more connections with him after that. I think my own natural protection mechanism was kicking in saying, "You dont' need this!"
But years later one night my honey and I were inspired to try to do our own merkaba meditation. Not doing any of the breathing stuff or specific rigamarole that Drunvalo teaches - by then I'd forgotten it all, anyway! -- but just imagining the sacred shape of the merkaba around our energy fields as a way to connect with Spirit.
We only did the meditation for about ten minutes before we went to bed, felt a nice energy buzz, but didn't really think anything more about it as it wasn't something that seemed important to add to our "bag of tricks." It was more testing out the energy and going, "okay, there's energy in that, but so what?" Since it didn't really connect with heart energy as strongly as some of our other prayers and invocations, it didn't seem like the greatest technique, but we kept an open mind about it.
The next morning my honey went off to work. I was working from home and at one point in the morning needed to run out for a bit. I got in the car and left and then realized I'd forgotten something and needed to go back home. About ten minutes had elapsed since I'd left the apartment.
At the time we were living in an apartment on the bottom floor of a building with three floors, four apartments on each floor. You had to buzz the intercom system outside and have the person in that apartment buzz you in the door to get in. (Of course, I'm sure this could be abused, but during the day very few people were home in that building and wouldn't normally be buzzing in just anybody who rang their intercom. The intercom also had a voice aspect to it, so you'd have to speak and say who you are as you buzzed an apartment for them to know it was okay to buzz you in.)
Anyway, I went back to the apartment, and a man is standing in the inner vestible (supposedly secure) looking visibly startled to see me. Like I'd caught him in the act.
He showed me his ID. He was from the Department of Defense. He then appeared to think very quickly on his feet and said he had been hired to do a security check on one of our neighbors. Except this particular "neighbor" hadn't been living there for years. But the former neighbor had been former military and it is possible that he had gone on to apply for work somewhere else, thereby triggering a security check with his old neighbors. My dad went through this as he left the active military and applied for government work that required a security clearance - people would sometimes check in on his neighbors to see if my dad had any dirt under his nose. (Which he didn't!)
Anyway, the department of the defense guy proceeded to ask me some questions, and he REALLY wanted my honey's phone number (he was the one renting the apartment.) Allegedly to simply ask him about this neighbor of his.
So I gave him my honey's numbers at work and at home.
The man proceeded to call really intensely -- kept leaving messages for my honey at home and at work until he finally agreed to meet with the guy at his office for a few minutes. And they talked about the former neighbor, and since my honey had never known the guy there wasn't much he could tell the DOD guy about him.
But it seemed a tad suspicious that within 12 hours of us doing this merkaba meditation and feeling some powerful energy go "click" that a Department of Defense person showed up in our secured vestible (it's highly doubtful anybody would have let him in that day; all of our other downstairs neighbors were NOT home.) And then he seemed to come up with a suspicious story about what he was really doing there. The whole time he seemed to want to know what we were all about, what we did for a living, etc.
Probably wanted to see if we were terrorists or anarchists since we had put out some kind of energy radiation with the merkaba meditation that was probably picked up on local scanners of some kind.
What's interesting to ponder is what would have happened if I hadn't come home and found him in the vestible? Would he have broken into the apartment and snooped around? Because that's what it looked like he was preparing to do.
Again, it's amazing to me how much a lot of the popular metaphysical stuff like remote viewing, merkaba stuff through Drunvalo, and so forth is heavily monitored by shady government types.
They can't come out and say "Doing merkaba meditations is illegal!" because that would mean they would have to acknowledge that there was real power in it.
Instead, there's lots of surveillance, the occasional bullying, and sometime an in your face "We're going to get rid of you because you pissed us off."
Anyway, I just wanted to share that as a cautionary tale about the merkaba stuff. I'd never before had a Department of Defense spook show up where I was living and so boldly attempt to break in in the middle of the day. Weird.
LipstickMystic aka Jennifer