Topic: Visual flicker and other perceptions
Hello. After 6 months of reading only, I am finally ready to post again. I thought I'd choose some repeated experiences I have had recently with you, and ask if anyone else has experienced similar things.
I'll try to describe this because it's difficult to interpret as it is, let alone pass on the description of it. The experiences are:
1) If you hold your hands out at a book reading distance from you, and form a circular shape with your thumbs and index fingers, that is about the same size as this 'hole' that I see randomly. Now imagine that you see that sized circle, with a smaller circle inside it, followed by a smaller circle, and so on until its minute. I see this an opaque object, which flashes a slightly brighter pulse I guess, moving inwards at high speeds. I guess you could liken it to a portal that you would see on some fancy sci-fi movie. Anyway, I know its me rather than something outside of me, because whereever I look it follows where I'm looking. So that's not so much my worry, it's more the weirdness of it in the first place, and secondly the randomness of it. Sometimes when I'm having a shower, sometime when I'm waiting for a bus, and at infrequent intervals. It only lasts maybe a minute or two. So yes, that is the first.
2) On occasion, I will wake up naturally from being asleep. If I do so gradually, as in going from dreams to fully awake, as my eyes are opening I will see what I can only describe as 'visual flicker'. I know a lot of you no longer own televisions, but think back to when you used to have them. Or even computer screens. Do you remember the difference between a CRT screen, and a flatscreen that you may now have or have seen? You might notice the difference in flicker -- for televisions, the old ones here were 50Hz and the new ones are 100Hz. At 100Hz, you can't notice it, but at 50Hz you can see the screen flickering. Well that is how I describe my visual experience sometimes when I wake up -- but a lot slower, perhaps 10Hz. I literally see everything flickering, and then as I fully wake up, it speeds up and becomes normal and unnoticeable. So thats the second thing.
3) The third thing, and if you haven't already you will pick up on a trend that this is yet another visual thing. I sometimes take baths, because I find it relaxing, particularly at night. I do so turning the lights off, so its pitch black. I guess in a way its like sensory deprivation. But sometimes I will close my eyes or keep them open -- either way I can't literally see anything, and hold my arms out in front of me. Now this time its cool, because when I concentrate by not thinking about anything...does that make sense? I can see flashes of something, some kind of colour, waving around wherever my arms go. But its not a rigid shape or outline, just a flowing kind of thing, which mimics the movements of my arms. I guess its bright, but not outstandingly bright in colour. As in, I notice and perceive it, but it doesn't magically light up the room. It's just there.
4) Finally, and yes you guess it another visual perception thing. Sometimes -- I do use the word sometimes a lot don't I, but it's just the way these go, I'll look at a wall, or another solid object, and see it vibrating..... Now I don't mean like shaking on the spot, but as in its there, but it isn't fully there. Now this I liken to cartoons, and the way they are created. You see the animation because its flicked at a certain speed, yet if you cut the speed down you can tell that its just individual shots that make up the complete motion. So that's how I would say I see these real/solid objects -- as if they are a cartoon that has been slowed down. Yet when I look at them properly, like a double take - they go back to normal and are unnoticeable as usual. That's it.
So these are my recent experiences I thought I'd share. They aren't world changing I know, and I'm sorry. But I thought this would be a good place to share them, with a higher chance of someone understanding what I'm talking about.
Or having a better suggestion than just - 'you should get a doctor to check that out'.
I hope everyone is going well,
Matt
