Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

whywhywhy wrote:

This is so odd!  Two nights ago at around 3 AM I am wide awake thinking about many subjects including my NR postings.  If some of you have noticed I have not posted much in the last month or so.  I began to think my posts have no beef and made no major contribution.  I also got tire of the endless arguments going back and forth over subjects that are extremely subjective.

My intentions here are not to inflame but to finally express what is really going in my head……………….the changes in perceptions and concepts I have undergone at this stage in my life.  Before I list some of these perceptions/ideas it feels appropriate to address the question of why I thought my posts were inadequate.     
I will stop at this time and I am sorry for getting this thread of track.  So, I will get off from the podium now.

Regards

(Ferit comes to the stage which is half-lighted, the audience is not there the show is finished. Ferit thinks to himself)

C'mon Lee. All the posts have great value - at least for me. 

Sure I'm aware that my posts always comes a bit behind, because I make my research on many subjects newly according to many people here.

I didn't count how many times I've heard about a subject, a name, a conspiracy subject that I hear for the first time and come here to "search" section and find great posts which are taking the subject from many angles and also have sources and links for further research.

No one has all the answers. No one has whole views. No one has all the right opinions. That's the value of being in a place like NR. I think everybody (from most frequent poster to a non-poster) has effect on NR's unique style.

(Ferit gets out of the stage. Lights turns off.)

Change we must, to live again
- Jon Anderson

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Marcus wrote:

You have started something now! big_smile  I understand about attitude and motivation toward money, and that ones perspective makes all the difference.  But what sort of examples can you specifically give which allowed you to do this?  How are you earning, what are your investments etc.  (Maybe a topic for another thread cuz I can see this topic totally sending this thread in a different direction)...

lol. .you're right about that. . I have posted a little bit in the economy/business section however I will start a new thread over there for anybody who's interested. .

It is not for us to understand love, but simply to make space for it.

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

lyra wrote:

- Take a moment to sit down and list out everything that's great about yourself, and what you got right this time around!

(I'm doing it now, in this forum.)

(1) I rarely complain, or trash others. 
(2) I've developed the ability to wait patiently in supermarket check-out lines, DMV lines, all kinds of lines without any anxiety.
(3) I do not react with frustration to mishaps like auto-accidents, or losing something, or getting lost--instead, I wonder what the lesson is.
(4) I can clear my mind if I need to.  I only suffer a busy mind if I'm lazy, or particularly lit up. 
(5) I can convert negative thought-loops into feelings of joy and enthusiasm into less than a half hour.
(6) I am forgiving.  Six years ago, a lady hit me in a crosswalk, giving me a skull fracture, and the first thing I said to her was: "I forgive you."  And I meant it.
(7) I've written three plays this year (one commissioned), one ten-minute play was produced (and I was paid), two spiritual articles that I really like and helped others.  I'm following my bliss--slowly but surely, like the turtle.

lyra wrote:

- Think of all the people you've met in life that you admire, and write out what it is about them that you admire so much!  See about adopting some of those traits as your own!

I met somebody two nights ago that I admire--a friend named Bess.  I admire her because she's alive and fearlessly open with people, knows who's kissing her ass and points it out and doesn't respect it.  She survived being homeless for two and half months in an Alaskan, seventy below zero winter by squatting in a trailer with holes in the wall and eating microwave popcorn and hitchhiking into town to fill her water bottle.  She isn't bitter.  She's in love with life and in love with a fisherman and seems only to want to have a good time in life.

I want to adopt her loudness!  Her un-apologeticness!

lyra wrote:

- Make it a habit to try to find what's good about others!

What's good about lyra is basically what I found good about Bess a couple of nights ago: a kind of upbeat mercilessness.  A refusal to compromise for anything below the feeling of being on fire...

You can't change a tiger's stripes,
but you can avoid its teeth.

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

I don't mind tooting my own horn! big_smile

--I'm pretty imaginative and insightful
--I've actually helped a few people in a substantial way in my life
--I've changed myself for the better by facing, accepting, and letting go of some of the worst aspects of myself
--I've learned to like myself more, for legitimate reasons

Thanks for this thread!

--Justin

20 (edited by lyra 2005-12-28 16:24:34)

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

freeme wrote:

So, I'll be the first brave soul.  (toot toot) 
Brave.  Yup that would be me.  It's a baaaaaaad idea to ever tell me I "can't" do something. wink 
Intelligent. 
Creative.
Strong energy.  For as long as I can remember, I can walk into a room and almost instantly it will become calmer.  I am learning now how to direct and control this energy.

dreamosis wrote:

(1) I rarely complain, or trash others.
(2) I've developed the ability to wait patiently in supermarket check-out lines, DMV lines, all kinds of lines without any anxiety.
(3) I do not react with frustration to mishaps like auto-accidents, or losing something, or getting lost--instead, I wonder what the lesson is.
(4) I can clear my mind if I need to.  I only suffer a busy mind if I'm lazy, or particularly lit up.
(5) I can convert negative thought-loops into feelings of joy and enthusiasm into less than a half hour.
(6) I am forgiving.  Six years ago, a lady hit me in a crosswalk, giving me a skull fracture, and the first thing I said to her was: "I forgive you."  And I meant it.
(7) I've written three plays this year (one commissioned), one ten-minute play was produced (and I was paid), two spiritual articles that I really like and helped others.  I'm following my bliss--slowly but surely, like the turtle.

That's awesome.  smile  It was nice to read what you both had to say about yourselves.   Those are all great qualities.


tenetnosce wrote:

There is a fundamental difference between tooting your own horn for the sheer sake of showing it off and feeling special, and tooting your own horn in hopes that others will notice they have one to toot for themselves.

I really like this quote, btw, particularly the part I bolded.  smile


tenetnosce wrote:

The other day I was visiting with some friends and one of them was mentioning how well he has done in the last year with his investments.  The woman he was talking to started to get uncomfortable and squirmy, quickly changing the subject.  She had a look on her face which said, "Great for you, but why are you telling me this?"

Later on in the evening when we got back to the house, I, being an unusual sort of fellow, asked him how he did it.

I know what you mean by this reaction - it's the "Oh, well, that's great, thanks for showing off and rubbing it in how well you're doing versus how miserable the rest of us are doing.  Big show off!" 

I'm an "unusual" one too --- always asking people unusual and unexpected questions (as long as it's something that they mentioned first....I never prod first and act nosey....)  so I would have totally asked him how he did it too had I been there and he brought it up. 

Ain't it fun being unusual?  big_smile   You can learn a lot in life! 


whywhywhy[/quote wrote:

I will stop at this time and I am sorry for getting this thread of track.  So, I will get off from the podium now.

Your post wasn't off track.  No worries!

Now get back on that podium!

big_smile


Well, I must say, this thread turned out better than I thought it would.  Seriously came thiiiiiiiis close to deleting it within hours after posting it, fearing the whole New Moon Window thing, wondering what I was thinking at the time that I wrote it, etc. etc. blah blah blah.   It was all well and good at the time I was typing it, but hours later I was tired and no longer feeling the passion for it, and felt that it was a bunch of insanity that should just be deleted.

Just goes to show, you never can tell.....

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

21 (edited by Jen 2005-12-30 12:25:37)

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Jen toots her own horn:

toot toot toot toot toot, toot toot!

(to the tune of "Shave and a haircut, two bits!")

big_smile

EDIT:  As it happens,  in the course of an email exchange, someone made a nice observation about me the other day, so I'll let him toot the horn for me, including the context:

Jen wrote:

Re "accidents" and "luck", they are actually
coincidences (literally, co-incidents) that are part and parcel of
the paths we choose for ourselves, moment by moment. It's all one
thing ….

And, re what someone said about the Divine having a will of its own,
and thus our own freewill had it limits:

Jen wrote:

If we accept that WE are that divinity--that there is no separation
between us and the Divine--then we can understand that we are
totally free within that shaping force.

friend wrote:

Yes.  I believe that there are no "accidents" per se, that what are
perceived and labeled as such have, beneath the seeming random
surface, teleological principles at work.  You mention, "it's all
one thing" and "there is no separation," and they evince, as far as
I'm concerned, that you've grown beyond dualism, superficial
bifurcation, and the "either/or."  It's about maintaining the
tension between all polarities, an evolved way of being.

That was nice to hear smile

22 (edited by artichoke 2005-12-31 22:59:18)

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

lyra wrote:

...

WE HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO ONLY ACKNOWLEDGE THE NEGATIVE, AND IGNORE THE POSITIVE, AT THE EXPENSE OF OUR OWN SELF ESTEEM.  WE ARE EXPECTED TO PUT OURSELVES DOWN IN CONSTANT SELF DEPRECIATION IN ORDER TO MAKE EVERYBODY AROUND US FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES!!!!

...

- Take a moment to sit down and list out everything that's great about yourself, and what you got right this time around!

- Think of all the people you've met in life that you admire, and write out what it is about them that you admire so much!  See about adopting some of those traits as your own!   Be the person you admire in others!

I too have been thinking about this in the past week or so, adding to the coincidence. 

My thoughts were: I don't want people to think I am arrogant, because it would make things harder for me.  Making enemies is rarely a good idea, and even when it seems like it would be a good idea, it still isn't.  But then I realized that I never come across as arrogant to the people I am compatible with.  Some others find me arrogant no matter what I do and how unbelievably humble I act.  Some people like me and some don't and it hasn't got much to do with little things that are under my conscious control, so I can just relax a bit more.  This doesn't mean that I can avoid the unpleasant folks.  I can't, especially at work.  Can't fix every problem; some will just sit there and cost me regardless of what I do so I can just accept that fact.

I don't think I will list strong points here because I am OK in this respect.  This isn't a problem for me, but I still can relax more about the whole issue as described in the last paragraph.

I think it's a great idea to adopt things that others are doing that you admire or covet.  At first I was amazed I could do it.  And thanks for the reminder, I should look around for new stuff to glom onto.  It doesn't have to be something you admire for "good" reasons, it could be some behavior that helps them make money or have more control in work or social situations.  I haven't done it in a while!  I keep thinking of a funny saying, even though it isn't quite the best mental attitude: fake it 'til you make it.

David

23 (edited by tenetnosce 2006-01-01 02:55:14)

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Toot!  Toot!

We interrupt this program to make the following important announcement. . .

I am the shit!!

We now return to your regularly scheduled programming. . .

It is not for us to understand love, but simply to make space for it.

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Yes.  Yes. 

I see the challenge with referring to myself as excrement.  But at least it's quality excrement.

Oh and Happy New Year!

wink

It is not for us to understand love, but simply to make space for it.

25

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Let's not forget, manure is the best fertilizer!

big_smile

26 (edited by lyra 2006-01-01 12:57:39)

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

artichoke wrote:

I too have been thinking about this in the past week or so, adding to the coincidence.

Interesting!   



artichoke wrote:

I think it's a great idea to adopt things that others are doing that you admire or covet.

Not sure if covet would be the word for it...but admire, yes, definitely!  smile  In thinking back on the people that I liked the best, those people who made an impact on me, the people I can't forget, no matter how many years go by, I naturally have to reflect on what it was about them that made their personalities so memorable, what it was about them that struck a positive chord within me.   Which naturally led to the idea of adapting those traits as my own.  Becoming what I admired in them.

A good example would be the boss I had back in 2001, in California.  She was from Australia, and was by far THE coolest boss I've ever had...but was also a neat person in general.   What I really liked and admired about her were her constant upbeat, smiling happy positive personality;  the way that she even admitted that she couldn't hold a grudge or hold onto any anger.   She would get mad, say how she felt (namely to her boyfriend...) then be over it and move on;  and most importantly.........the way that she didn't impose her own negative ideas onto other people.  !!!

If someone (like me for instance!) had an idea that sounded far fetched or totally nutty, she'd listen with interest, her face would light up, she'd grin, and have a "Wow!  Cool!" mindset.....then wish you the best and sincerely hope that everything worked out for you!  She'd get excited for you!  She wouldn't frown like most people, saying crap like, "Why do you want to do something like THAT?"  or scrunch up her face, making sour puss faces, expressing her personal doubt and displeasure and skepticism.

In short:

There was no judgement.  Only sincere excitement and encouragement.  Like, Cool!  Go for it! 

And I like that!   Especially being that I was that person with the crazy sounding ideas.  "Oh yeah, I'm thinking I'm just gonna like, drive across the country and go to Florida next!  I've never been there!  But the beaches look awesome!   This should be fun!"

When I told her that, she got so excited for me at the prospect.  She was the one in fact who put the idea in my head about "You could serve cocktails on the beach!"  While nearly EVERY other person who heard of my plan was making faces, getting all sourpuss on me, trying to trash Florida and discourage me from going. 

So, I've (tried) to adopt her mindset for myself.   It's a great way to be.   Let's hear it for Australians!!!  The best people on the planet!  big_smile  (I actually do think that, btw....have yet to meet an Australian that wasn't the most awesome person I've ever come across....)

I think if we were all raised in Australia, we'd all be better people!  big_smile  haha

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

On the subject of adopting admirable qualities in others:  I finally got around to doing something which I've wanted to do for awhile, but for some reason never did until now.     I collected pictures from the internet of all my favorite people: the ones I find most inspiring in my life for a variety of different reasons.   These are the great intellects and spirits who, merely by the knowledge that they truly exist and are  REAL, bring joy to my heart and hope to my soul.  My heroes.   I printed out their pictures and cropped them neatly, then posted them prominently up on the wall, to serve as a constant reminder to me of who they were and what they were about.    Having them there helps me to keep focused on who I am and what I'm really doing here in this crazy world.   I also think it will help to keep me from sinking too low when things seem especially bleak; I have a slight tendency toward depression and I think it will help with that too.   It's easy to lose focus and slip up sometimes in the face of what's happening in the world, so this is one thing I've done to try to give myself a leg up in that constant spiritual battle. 

Many Native American peoples practiced ancestor remembrance, believing that by preserving the memory of those who had gone before,  they also kept alive the very spirits of those people.  So I've done what I describe above with that same feeling and purpose in mind.   And, in my act, I've included pictures of people both living and dead, since that particular distinction is of no importance when it comes to reminding me of the qualities in others towards which I want to strive in my own life.

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

morningsun76 wrote:

On the subject of adopting admirable qualities in others:  I finally got around to doing something which I've wanted to do for awhile, but for some reason never did until now.     I collected pictures from the internet of all my favorite people: the ones I find most inspiring in my life for a variety of different reasons.

I don't want to do this.  I recall I was in a session taught by a Qigong master, and one of the exercises was to imagine famous people of history and to do something that seemed like substituting their spirits for my own.  It felt wrong and I didn't do it.  My own view on this is that they are not God any more than anyone else is, so if I'm going to worship anyone it should be God not another flawed human.  The OT warns against worshipping graven images.

morningsun76 wrote:

Having them there helps me to keep focused on who I am and what I'm really doing here in this crazy world.

It would do the reverse for me.  Just my own view that I feel rather strongly about.

David

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

artichoke wrote:
morningsun76 wrote:

On the subject of adopting admirable qualities in others:  I finally got around to doing something which I've wanted to do for awhile, but for some reason never did until now.     I collected pictures from the internet of all my favorite people: the ones I find most inspiring in my life for a variety of different reasons.

I don't want to do this.

Well nobody said you had to.  morningsun76 was sharing with everybody something that he liked to do.  It wasn't directed at you personally.

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Lyra et al :Once tooted my own horn to a student, then, ( raised female, thus trained to be humble) said "Oh, sorry...that sounds so arrogant."

His reply (after a thoughtful moment)..."...ummmm...I think it's not bragging if you can do it".  A definition that I have lived with Happily Ever After...