1 Topic by lyra (edited by lyra 2005-12-26 21:19:57)

  • lyra
  • lyra
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  • Registered: 2004-03-25

Topic: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Warning!

Crazy rant ahead!  Full of capital letters, bolds, and swear words!

(stepping up onto the soapbox...clearing my throat....)


Ahem!

I'm sick of the whole "walking on eggshells" that we all feel we have to do around here now, because a few crazy pawns ruined it for the rest of us!!!!!

The last straw for me was ChristineB. feeling she had to delete her post in the "New Years Revolutions" thread............................for fear of sounding arrogant!!!

How messed up is that!!!   This is what the pawns with their accusations of "Egotistical!!"  "Arrogant!!"  "Get over yourself!!!"  have done!   

It's a microcosm for the rest of the world!!!!!!!!!!!

Look around at our society.........listen to what comes out of peoples mouths on a regular basis!!  Seriously, LISTEN to the things that people say, and monitor your own thoughts as well!  How much of what we think, and what other people say is nothing but negative negative negative!  Criticize, bitch, gripe and complain!  Moan moan moan, groan groan groan!   Only seeing what is wrong and ugly with everything in any given situation!!

WE HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO ONLY ACKNOWLEDGE THE NEGATIVE, AND IGNORE THE POSITIVE, AT THE EXPENSE OF OUR OWN SELF ESTEEM.  WE ARE EXPECTED TO PUT OURSELVES DOWN IN CONSTANT SELF DEPRECIATION IN ORDER TO MAKE EVERYBODY AROUND US FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES!!!!

And it's crap!

There is nothing wrong with acknowledging your strengths!  With having a lofty goal!!!!   With feeling full of positive pep and proclaiming your ideas and plans!!!  There truly is nothing arrogant or egotistical about it. 

I want to see a thread where people rebel against this "self depreciation / bash yourself to make others feel better / keep quiet so as to not be the nail that sticks up higher than the others" programming and get on here and TOOT YOUR OWN HORN. 

Can people even imagine doing such a thing??  Probably not, so engrained is the programming about being a "braggert", about being "full of yourself" !

And if you don't feel comfortable tooting your own horn and proudly proclaiming, "HEY!  I HAVE SOME GREAT QUALITIES ABOUT MYSELF!   I CAN DO ____ AND _____ AND _____, AND FURTHERMORE, SOME NICE THINGS THAT I'VE DONE HAVE BEEN ____ AND ____ AND I'M PROUD OF MYSELF BECAUSE ____ AND _____ AND _____"  then the next best thing is to TOOT SOMEBODY ELSE'S!  Tell somebody else what's wonderful about THEM!

And if you're not comfortable doing that, then at least use this thread to open up the subject of what not only goes on here, but also in the "real" world too, on a rampant daily basis.

Everywhere you go, people tiptoe around on eggshells, out of fear of what others will think.   f*ck WHAT EVERYBODY ELSE THINKS.

I want a world where we're not afraid to be who we are.

This leads to the sub-subject about "HUMILTY"............Well let me tell you.......the defintion for humiilty has been twisted around and missused by those who act on behalf of the forces that serve to try to keep you down, okay?? 

There is nothing wrong with acknowledging your positive traits, stengths, and good characteristics.....   In fact, it would be almost sinful to refuse to do so!  That's self abuse in my opinion.   We think NOTHING of bashing ourselves, of pointing out our supposed "faults" and "shortcomings", of putting ourselves down to others to "fit in" and not be the taller nail......I'M SO FAT...I HATE MY HAIR.....LOOK AT MY BAD SKIN....I'M SO UGLY.....SHE HAS BIGGER BOOBS....I SUCK....I'M SO FAAAAAT.....and yet, we recoil at the idea of acknowledging our strengths!!  Because some negative naysayers will stand up and chastise ourselves for doing so!   "OH, YOU'RE SO EGOTISTICAL!!  LISTEN TO YOURSELF, GOING ON ABOUT YOUR POSITIVE TRAITS AND CHARACTERISTICS!   WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ANYWAY!   YOU ARROGANT FOOL!  YOU EGO MANIAC!  IF YOU **REALLY** FELT GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF, THEN YOU WOULDN'T EVER HAVE TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR GOOD POINTS!   SO IT'S OBVIOUS THAT YOU'RE ACTUALLY SOOOOO INSECURE ABOUT YOURSELF!     SIT BACK DOWN AND GO BACK TO FOCUSING ON EVERYTHING THAT'S WRONG AND UGLY WITH YOURSELF AND THE REST OF THE WORLD!" 

How f*cked up is that!  And I'm tired of it!

You want to know what my new year's REVOLTution is??  This is it, right here!  This post.   I want to start a revolution where people take time out to sit down, and ponder everything that's great and wonderful about themselves, and others, and where people won't be afraid to be who they really are, and will not tolerate watching others attempt to get bullied by pawns who would have them believe they are arrogant or egotistical merely for acknowledging their own great qualities and talents!   Where we can all learn to master our inner dialogue to stop having those negative repeating thought loops that run a neverending gripe-fest recording, and where we can look at another's strengths and positive traits with admiration, not insecurity or envy!   Myself included!  Cause I still look at others who I perceive as being "better" than me in some way with twinges of jealous envy!  We've all done it.....because our society has created that monster.   Our society never ingrained in us the concept of being supportive, proud and full of admiration for others.......only competition, envy, and coveting which breeds insecurity, discord and division.   So we ALL could benefit from the concepts in this thread.

- Take a moment to sit down and list out everything that's great about yourself, and what you got right this time around!

- Think of all the people you've met in life that you admire, and write out what it is about them that you admire so much!  See about adopting some of those traits as your own!   Be the person you admire in others!

- Keep close tabs on that inner dialogue, and each and every time it wants to gripe and bitch about something, contradict it!   Think the exact opposite!   Over time, you will reprogram yourself!  (this is a hard one, wow!  seems almost impossible, but I'm sure it can be done!)

- Make it a habit to try to find what's good about others!   And if you can't because they're just that bad, then instead of thinking of them in negative terms, just be neutral and don't think anything at all and move on!  (another hard one!  Seems almost impossible, but there are lots of people who've done it, so it means it's do-able!)

So here you have it.   Good lessons for ALL of us, myself included.  !

Let the chips fall where they may!  Lyra's last hurrah.


(stepping down off my soapbox.....)

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

lyra's Website

  • From: the mine
  • Registered: 2005-11-15

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Nothing You Say Matters To Us!
f*ck You!
Spit Your Worthless Point Of View, A Cog In The Machine
Your Damn Words Are Straight Up Lies! Continue To Deceive
Nothing You Say Matters To Us
You Are A Virus Spreading Disease!

Nothing You Say Matters To Us!
f*ck You!
Sow Your Seeds Of Ignorance
You Cyberparasite
Seems You Say Most Anything To Stab Me With Your Lies
You Are A Virus Spreading Disease!
Your Life Is So Sad, Spreading Lies Of Me
Reap What You Sow, Your Words Are Shit

Assume That Yu Know My Thoughts (all I Want To Do Is See)
Infect Me With Your Disease
Tapping Away On The Keys
Change Your Face In Front Of Me
Safe Behind The Cyber Screen Wishing That You Knew The Truth
All I Know Is What I Read
Nothing You Say Matters To Us!

Fear Factory-cyberwaste
Copyright 2004 Roadblock Music, Inc.

"I hate dreaming. because when you want to sleep, you want to sleep. Dreaming is work. Next thing you know I have to build a go-kart with my ex landlord"
-The late Mitch Hedberg
  • Registered: 2004-03-25

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Lyra wrote:

The last straw for me was ChristineB. feeling she had to delete her post in the "New Years Revolutions" thread............................for fear of sounding arrogant!!!

Lyra's post is well stated; however, I wish to set the record straight -- I deleted it not because I
FEARED it sounded arrogant but TO ME, it was arrogant.

I rarely if ever am self-deprecative.  And I won't allow my friends to talk badly of themselves, even in jest.  I am aware of the power of words -- so I don't speak lightly or submissively.

Arrogance is a blinding trait I believe.  There is an enormous difference between arrogance and knowing ones positive traits and believing in them.

While tooting one's own horn is probably better than beating oneself up -- neither would be necessary if one simply lived a life of positive actions.

  • Registered: 2004-10-15

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

I think many people confuse positivity and arrogance.

Being positive is to believe in ones self and abilities and have confidence in their chosen path.  It's okay to talk about these things, because what we say and think affects who and what we are.  So saying we believe in ourselves is fine.  Sometime this means saying "Yes I can do xyz and I am pretty darn good at it!"  That's being positive.  Positivity elevates oneself and others.  Positiity doesn't usually attack at others or other things, rather it pulls them up, or attempts to transmute either the thing / person itself, or if that can't be done then positivity will attempt to transmute its own perspective to a higher resonence.

Arrogance is very different.  It comes from believing oneself supperior to others.  "I am really very good at xyz, much better than everyone else!"  This isn't really positivity, because the thoughts and words are being used for self-elevation.  Arrogance beats others down whilst it elevates oneself.  Arrogance often attacks others and other things it percieves as less than itself, because it fears being dragged down to what it believes to be a "lower" level.

Negitivity is very selfish and fearful.  It hates to see others do well because it is reminded of its own percieved failings.  To negativity Arrogance and Positivity are one and the same - because it feels they are both above it...that they are something beyond its grasp.  Negativity always sees the problems and failings in everything...more often than not it won't even attempt for change because it lacks confidence or is fearful of making its situation worse.  Nearly always negativity will seek to drag others to its own level.  It strikes out against the arrogant and the positve both without distinction.

A lot of people are so wrapped up in themselves, and so fearful that they can't see the world for what it is.  Many people instantly see the negative aspects to everything and everyone.  In fact just yesterday I was discussing Virgin Galactic with someone, and they belived the whole idea was folly, and that Richard Branson was setting himself up for a fall...because the "powers" will never allow such a thing to happen.  What a fearful perspective!  As though the guy should never attempt the idea because the current world system doesn't allow it.  The world cannot change without positivity - and it cannot change without people constantly knowing their own capabilities and working toward them.

A few individuals even in recent times have changed the world.  Nearly two decades ago, Bill Gates said he wanted a computer in every house...and that he knew how to make this happen.  Arrogance - or positive knowing of his own capabilities?

Thought Manifestation

Marcus's Website

  • Registered: 2004-04-21

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

It helps if we remember that others will see what we say from their perspective, not ours.  If we want others to pay attention and take what we say to heart, we'll make a little effort so that the message is palatable to all.  At the same time when we listen to what others say we can bear in mind that it's from the other's perspective and know that we need not take anything personally.  With judging the messenger out of the way we can take what we will from the message without distraction.

6 Reply by lyra (edited by lyra 2005-12-27 09:12:04)

  • lyra
  • lyra
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Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Thanks for the responses.  Using ChristineB.'s post may not have been the best example, but it was what got me started on formulating a post in my mind, concerning ideas that have been floating about for awhile.   The post combines several ideas into one - the idea of not caring what others think, self-censorship, being unable to acknowledge one's postive traits as easily as the negative, thinking / speaking in a more positive manner, egotism vs. humility and all the shades of gray in between, and on a smaller note, what has been going on here lately at NR.  So, lots of stuff, all rolled into one, in what probably sounded like total insanity upon first read. wink   

So far everybody has had good ideas - I see Soloflecks was paraphrasing ideas that can be found in The Four Agreements.  Marcus had a good point here:


Marcus wrote:

Arrogance is very different.  It comes from believing oneself supperior to others.

That's exactly it, right there.  I'll even take it a step further and say that one can even acknowledge that they do something better than another, and are more skilled or adept at something, but it still doesn't make them sound arrogant, and it doesn't mean they have a superiorty complex.   Not if it's just a matter-of-fact statement.  There are plenty of things I've done better than others - and plenty of people who blow me out of the water in terms of their own skills which I will never top.   That's not arrogance.  That's just a matter of fact statement of truth.  wink

It's when you actually elevate yourself above others, saying you're a better person as a whole, that it becomes a not so good issue, like Marcus was saying.     

So while "Tooting your own horn!" may be over the top big_smile there's nothing wrong with a little self appreciation now and again, nothing wrong with remembering to focus on one's positive qualities.  Because in the world we live in, usually if we don't do it, then nobody else will, and we can often times find ourselves sinking into the negative griping mindset of many of the people around us who only want to focus on the negative.

Anyway, thanks for the replies.  Sorry for the insanity.  smile

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

lyra's Website

  • From: England
  • Registered: 2005-04-20

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Friendly strength. i am ok and you are ok
Friendly weakness. you are ok i am not ok
Hostile strength. i am ok you are not ok
Hostile weakness. i am not ok and you are not ok

Interesting model from Robert Anton wilson's Prometheus rising that looks at how we imprint and condition brain circuits.
http://deoxy.org/raw1.htm
http://deoxy.org/8circuit.htm

book here in PDF format http://www.rraurl.com/paula/knowledge/R … Rising.pdf

Its not like we are fractions of the whole but rather versions of the whole.
  • From: US
  • Registered: 2004-09-21

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Lyra,
You are a spitfire and I admire that in you.  You are also a fantastic writer and a brave and adventuresome soul. 

Funny, I was thinking of using the exact same words last night to post on a different forum for slightly different reasons, but literally the exact same words "toot your own horn".  We must be on the same wavelength (surprise surprise smile ).  I notice that no one has dared to toot yet.  Several people have analyzed your words, and CV posted his own personal rant.  roll

So, I'll be the first brave soul.  (toot toot) 
Brave.  Yup that would be me.  It's a baaaaaaad idea to ever tell me I "can't" do something. wink 
Intelligent. 
Creative.
Strong energy.  For as long as I can remember, I can walk into a room and almost instantly it will become calmer.  I am learning now how to direct and control this energy.

Let's see if that gets this rolling...

Never Give Up!

freeme's Website

  • Registered: 2004-04-09

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Amen, sister Lyra!
I haven't been much more than lurking with all that is going on in my life right now, so I am not sure what spawned Lyra to post this thread because there's alot I've missed. But, I have noticed some conflict in what I have read. I had to wonder what it was all about, but it doesn't matter in the scope of larger things.
I would just like to add my feelings and revolutions to this thread because I feel this topic is important to our survival. Last night I went to town to make the pickups of donated animal foods and do some late shopping for my honey. Got her some lovely music to listen to! Enya and Carlos Nakai. As I was driving in to town, I was looking at the stars and not running the usual self-deprication tapes in full blast that normally run when I feel I have screwed up. Something (and I know what it is) has been coming over me lately that I cannot tolerate self abuse anymore, even if I have made a mistake or perceived mistake. Someone else's projections can really mess you up sometimes. In short, I heard a voice, my positive higher self say "I am proud of you because you exist!" The message keeps coming to me to take care of myself. Bullocks to the ideas of negative programming. While you can learn from them, you can always "come home also, if you want". Throughout the rest of my nightly adventure in town, messages kept coming to be myself. I don't have to try and be something else out of fears of what someone  else may or may not think of me. We can honor our gifts, our qualities that make us unique and individuals. And at the same time they make us universal. I feel the universe would absolutely rejoice in that acknowledement. High five, all!

" Then it was, then again it will be. And though the course may change sometimes rivers always reach the sea." Robert Plant
  • lyra
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Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

freeme wrote:

Funny, I was thinking of using the exact same words last night to post on a different forum for slightly different reasons, but literally the exact same words "toot your own horn".  We must be on the same wavelength (surprise surprise smile ).

thook wrote:

As I was driving in to town, I was looking at the stars and not running the usual self-deprication tapes in full blast that normally run when I feel I have screwed up. Something (and I know what it is) has been coming over me lately that I cannot tolerate self abuse anymore, even if I have made a mistake or perceived mistake. Someone else's projections can really mess you up sometimes. In short, I heard a voice, my positive higher self say "I am proud of you because you exist!" The message keeps coming to me to take care of myself. Bullocks to the ideas of negative programming. While you can learn from them, you can always "come home also, if you want". Throughout the rest of my nightly adventure in town, messages kept coming to be myself. I don't have to try and be something else out of fears of what someone  else may or may not think of me. We can honor our gifts, our qualities that make us unique and individuals. And at the same time they make us universal. I feel the universe would absolutely rejoice in that acknowledement. High five, all!

Okay..............................this was freaking me out, but in a good way I guess.   What are the odds that both freeme and I would be thinking of the obscure and goofy phrase "Toot your own horn" on the same night, to post on a forum????

And in reading Thook's post, I can't get over how the message he was hearing from his higher self was word for word what appears in my original opening post.   "I am proud of you because ____"  No more self deprication internal tapes, no more self abuse, be yourself, don't be something else out of fear of what others will think, and honor our gifts and unique qualities...............!!

What in the....!  Wow..........!   Kinda freaky, I tell ya...........

Seems like something was mass beaming out a message of sorts, I don't know. 

Just call us the human antenna receivers!   haha

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

lyra's Website

  • From: The Singularity
  • Registered: 2005-09-23

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

There is a fundamental difference between tooting your own horn for the sheer sake of showing it off and feeling special, and tooting your own horn in hopes that others will notice they have one to toot for themselves.

I can't think of a more emotionally-charged aspect of self-tooting than money.

The other day I was visiting with some friends and one of them was mentioning how well he has done in the last year with his investments.  The woman he was talking to started to get uncomfortable and squirmy, quickly changing the subject.  She had a look on her face which said, "Great for you, but why are you telling me this?"

Later on in the evening when we got back to the house, I, being an unusual sort of fellow, asked him how he did it.

His partner looked and me and giggled.  She said, "You know, nobody ever asks him how he does it!"

I snickered.

Here's a toot to munch on:  In the last year I have quadrupled my income, tripled my savings, and grown my investments by 40 percent.

And nobody ever asks me how I did it either.

I did it by asking others how they did it, and I would have never known that they had done it unless they had told me so.

I did it by realizing that all of my negative attitudes and reactions toward money, and people that knew how to use money, was exactly the reason I never had any. 

*** END TOOT ***

It is not for us to understand love, but simply to make space for it.
  • Registered: 2004-03-25

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Tenetnosce -- 4xd your income, tripled your savings and grown your investments by 40%, I would really really like to know how did you do it?

Christine B

13 Reply by Jen

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Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Christine B. wrote:

Tenetnosce -- 4xd your income, tripled your savings and grown your investments by 40%, I would really really like to know how did you do it?

Christine B

Moi too--tell, tell!

Jen

  • Registered: 2004-10-15

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

tenetnosce wrote:

Here's a toot to munch on:  In the last year I have quadrupled my income, tripled my savings, and grown my investments by 40 percent.

And nobody ever asks me how I did it either.

I did it by asking others how they did it, and I would have never known that they had done it unless they had told me so.

I did it by realizing that all of my negative attitudes and reactions toward money, and people that knew how to use money, was exactly the reason I never had any. 

*** END TOOT ***

You have started something now! big_smile  I understand about attitude and motivation toward money, and that ones perspective makes all the difference.  But what sort of examples can you specifically give which allowed you to do this?  How are you earning, what are your investments etc.  (Maybe a topic for another thread cuz I can see this topic totally sending this thread in a different direction)...

Thought Manifestation

Marcus's Website

15 Reply by whywhywhy (edited by whywhywhy 2005-12-28 06:18:02)

  • From: LA
  • Registered: 2005-09-18

Re: Toot Your Own Horn!!!!!

Lyra,

This is so odd!  Two nights ago at around 3 AM I am wide awake thinking about many subjects including my NR postings.  If some of you have noticed I have not posted much in the last month or so.  I began to think my posts have no beef and made no major contribution.  I also got tire of the endless arguments going back and forth over subjects that are extremely subjective.

My intentions here are not to inflame but to finally express what is really going in my head……………….the changes in perceptions and concepts I have undergone at this stage in my life.  Before I list some of these perceptions/ideas it feels appropriate to address the question of why I thought my posts were inadequate.  I really wanted to be honest with my self and two things came to my mind for consideration.

1. It is possible I wanted my ideas to be praised as awesome and it never happened?  Am I that empty?
2. I really was not saying what I felt down to the essence of my soul……Is this the case?

I pondered for a while and finally decided that a combination of the two is more likely.  To say otherwise would be dishonest.  I decided this morning I will post my ideas on some of the main issues discussed in this forum and let the chips fall where they may.  I am not here to impress anybody…..I am here to express my thoughts, exchange ideas.  In this process of exchanging ideas the goal is to learn and teach. 


Conspiracies/NWO/Illuminati

Why is it that we worry and discuss so much about these issues?    They (excluding NWO) have been with us for thousand of years; they are with us right now and will be with us for eons.  When we mention the Illuminati the tendency is to think evil & dark, have we ever considered that some of them are actually good people trying to do the right thing as much as it is allowed?  Everybody in this planet has a purpose in their quest for vertical dimensional improvement.  Some of us choose the forces of darkness some of us may choose Light.  This is the basic concept that drives the universe………constant change…….motion…….entropy………..  We are like gladiators that fight in an arena constantly readjusting to a new threat.  None of the two on the arena is either good or bad, although they consider their opponent “the enemy”  or “an obstacle”  in the role they are playing.   We create our reality every second of our lives as we interpret the stimulation around us.   It is the interpretation of this stimulation that makes you love or hate the Illuminati/NWO.    If  you believe in creating your own reality then there is no absolute right or wrong, just Darkness and Light.  Live your life as you see fit and do not worry about these issues……………..They do not mean a damn thing!

Money/Matrix

There is so much talk about money and the Federal Reserve and most of it is negative.  The tendency is to think that money is “bad" and as a result we end up living a life on which we go from one paycheck to the other because deep inside we reject money.  Yes, I understand that paper money is worthless but it is the main system we use to exchange goods and by God we must learn to take advantage of it.  To me there is no major difference between a carrot and a dollar.   The carrot can be consumed immediately but the dollar can be exchanged for a carrot when the need to eat one comes up.  As a matter of fact a dollar is more valuable for I can buy whatever I want other than a carrot. 

MONEY IS GOOD IF SPENT IN A GOOD WAY…………..MONEY IS GOOD IF SHARED WITH OTHERS IN NEED………MONEY IS GOOD.

It is good to wish money and wealth so we can free ourselves from the menial daily work and spend more time doing something we may find more enlightening/constructive. 

To me unplugging from the Matrix does not mean becoming a hermit, or eating organic, or not eating meat, or rejecting money, etc...  Some of these are worth implementing but it is not necessarily unplugging from the Matrix.   Decoupling from a system such as the Matrix requires liberation of the mind, free thinking and spiritual enlightment.  A free mind can accomplish the impossible.  A free mind will allow you to explore grounds that have not been broken or have been labeled as unbreakable or stupid.  A free mind will empower your soul to seek out the light, to evolve into what it was meant to be.
   
I will stop at this time and I am sorry for getting this thread of track.  So, I will get off from the podium now.

Regards