Doubts even here... (Page 1 of 5)

What makes me sad is not always the ignorance but the sheer lack of real love. I went to the restaurant with "my extended family" a few weeks ago and it was so apparent. Everyone was stealing everyone else's energy (and I noticed it required efforts not to take part in that game), making "jokes" about other's weak points, all married couples just hated each others. And the few people who were on a certain path, whom I could feel the soul, were just isolated and couldn't speak between each others because all the other ones were monopolizing the discussion, filling it with noise. And any time a potentially interesting subject arose, it quickly got sidetracked. The same happened in a business-like meeting recently where all people, except me, were "christians". The more time goes on, the more unbearable all this is. I know it has to do with my perception, but I also feel that things are really getting more and more crazy and the surfaces are cracking and showing sometimes really ugly realities.

Luckily I do not really mind being alone and do not need to see such crazyness every day. Plus I have recently found some people around here who have a similar understanding as me of reality. This is absolutely invaluable. I feel there is a time to complain, and then it's important to simply accept this reality, even if it is far from what we know is possible, and do what we have to do in order to bring us closer to that better world. Moving outside of the illusion is really painful, and deciding to act according to the new parameters of the reality we intuit is not easy, but I feel this is what allows to transcend and go beyond the sorrow.

Last night I was talking to one of my family about the very same thing.  This is the best I can offer you from having gone through the same thing as you are now mentioning...

The conversation began with me mentioning how I needed to "prove my identity", when I took  £50 worth of coins into a bank, and requested it be swapped for notes.  I was told; "We can't do that unless you have an account here (we need to know your ID)".

The response to this from the guy I was relating this experience to:  "Well that's just how it is.  People in society commit crimes...so we need to have tight controls on society."  And THIS was coming from a guy that is aware of the Illuminati, power struggles, societies’ indoctrination of individuals and groups etc. plus much much more.  So quite naturally this attitude of his confused me.  Thus I asked him why he would say such a thing, when he knows full well that such methods of control are not in our best interests.

To this, he told me that - it is no good looking at it like that.  Whether or not we like it or don't like it is irrelevant.  We live in this society and therefore have to put up with the "rules" that it places upon us.  We cannot change it...therefore there is no point in thinking about it.

Even now I find this comment simply stunning!

But then I consider further.  He has over the years become to some extent awoken.  He sees that most people are "dumb"...that in essence these "dumb" people create their own little societies with their own rules which they rely on to tell them what the world is about.  Such people are asleep, vacant - no one is home, they just drift aimlessly.

Clearly to one who realises this, over time, they become further and further separated from the group.  In many cases that group comprises of family and friends.  In the case of the guy I was talking to, members of that group are his wife and his son.  Aside from myself he has *no one* to talk to about this issues at all!

This I think has led him to feeling the same thoughts as you mention Neomatrix.  A feeling of isolation; he finds it harder and harder to relate to others.  In some instances he has attempted to discuss such issues with others - or made such observations about a given issue.  To this, people react badly - and end up seeing him in a different light.  In essence he feels alienated; he feels he no longer "fits in".

So there he is, at some point in his past left feeling alone, isolated and alienated. 

Ultimately this gave him cause for reflecting upon this path he had chosen.  These feelings gave him doubt with regards to what he should be doing.  "If I continue upon this path of awakening, I am no longer like others.  I am becoming different - changing...others perceive this change, and in some cases will not want me a part of their "society".  Although I feel as though they are alienating me...is not the truth of the matter that *I* am alienating *them*?  After all they have their lives...they live these lives happy (after a fashion) and unaware.  Who am I to cast judgment upon them?  Who am I to observe and watch them - and comment upon our civilisation and its people?"

His feeling of loneliness which gave rise to doubt; gave him cause to see his "heightened" awareness as something useless to him.  Something that can only bring harm upon him – and not good.

And so arriving at such a conclusion, he promptly turned around and walked back into the sheep-pen, shutting the door behind him.  Now he remains inside that pen, an awakened mind that attempts to live as one asleep.  Still observing with an awakened consciousness, but never applying the knowledge learnt from this consciousness onto his life.  He believes that to do so will only cause him pain.

And thus for the last few decades he has remained trapped inside this pen.  He blames society around him, he blames money, he blames people of power, and he regrets constantly the path he has chosen.  BUT, he regrets only the decisions he has made within this matrix.  He doesn't even realise that is failure was in returning to this matrix.

Now he lives constantly wishing that he can do other things with his life.  Every aspect of his life he believes is outside of his control.  His wife dominates his ideologies totally, whilst questioning every aspect of what he does.  His son is no less different.

He has trapped himself within the matrix, even though he has the full ability to remove himself from it.

He gave me advice last night; telling me that I shouldn't progress along this path any longer.  That I should take care; because my awakened mind will change how I relate to others.  And that this change in me will alienate other towards me.  He told me that I would become alone, isolated and do myself more harm then good.

What he didn't realise is that I have already been through that area of isolation.  That I already went to the point where my observations set me aside totally and utterly from others.  I was out of the pen, and had gotten to the other side of that hill.

What he didn't realise is that I had experienced the alienation and the isolation caused by the hill separating me from the pen.  And he didn't realise I had already doubted.  That I felt as though I no longer knew my "place", in the universe.

But here there was a difference.  The guy I was talking to, at previous point in his life went back into the matrix.  But I knew I could never do that...even though at the time of my doubt I wished it.  So I struggled onward slowly.

Then one day, I looked around and could no longer see the hill!  I could no longer see the pen!  Yet the people from within that pen were all around me as they had always been.

And it was then I realised something quite profound.  The hill was an illusion!  The pen was an illusion!!

For those within the matrix they cannot see beyond its fabricated rules.  For these people they live a life based inside the matrix...they cannot see outside of it, for their minds are so totally and utterly asleep that they have no cause to look outside of it.

For those that awaken; they begin to see that there is more than what is shown to us by the matrix.  And so we begin a long arduous journey trying to escape it.

And in so doing we fail to realise something very important.  The goal isn't to escape the matrix.  Neither is our objective to transcend the matrix.  And this is true for one simple fact.

Although the matrix is merely a constructed illusory world, it is still real because it exists within the minds of so many!

When we awaken to the truth of the matrix, we become aware of our "self".  We become aware that we exist separate and independent from the matrix.  We begin to see truth; that our "self" is not defined by the rules set by the matrix.  We see that the illusion created by the matrix has caused us to live in an external world of projected rules and regulations.  A world of false perspectives that separate us from reality.

When we awaken, we see that the matrix is a false reality...and we realise that there is another reality.  We find that within this "real" reality we are in-tune with our "self".  We see the truths that our awakened mind discovers within this “real“? reality, also match the truths of our true “self“?.

And so we arrive at a very unique point.  We are at one with the world and universe around us.  And it is the matrix that tries constantly to stop us from recognising this "oneness".

But now...ask yourself this one thing.  Without the matrix how would you have awoken?  Without seeing the lies how would you have known the truth?  Without learning to see what is illusion, how would you have seen what is real?

The matrix was created to enslave us...but it is its own worst enemy, for it is the very tool that allows us to free ourselves!

The goal then isn't to walk away from the pen and over the hill.  The goal isn't to escape the matrix.

What we must learn is to live at once both outside and inside the matrix.

We must realise that just as it is the matrix that has allowed us to see reality.  This new reality has allowed us to see the truths of the matrix.

The truth outside of the matrix is that we are at one with each other.  That we are not separate.  So then we should take this knowledge we have found "outside" the matrix and apply it to our lives within the matrix.

We are therefore only separate from people, when we separate ourselves from them.  If we ignore the matrix, then we are merely constructing another matrix within our own minds that will ultimately isolate us.

In short; you move over the hill and take the knowledge you have learnt - don't out of doubt, fear or isolation go back to the pen!  Rather realise that there is no pen!  The pen is as illusionary as the matrix.

The greatest threat the matrix presents to us - is not in trapping us.  But rather in isolating us outside of it.

When we stand on the outside of the matrix analysing people within it; we are alienating both them and ourselves.  We must thus stand next to those within the matrix and live within it and without it.

This is the greatest teaching found in all the religions, myths and stories of the world.  We are told that Christ come from the heavens / God (outside the matrix), and told man not to live a life of greed and idolising.  He brought with him that which he knew of "real reality", and taught us how to bring it into harmony with the illusory reality.

When Buddha became enlightened...he transcended the Matrix!  But he came back!  He didn't stay outside the matrix because he knew to do so was to merely confine himself into another aspect of reality.  He came back and brought the outside into harmony with the inside.

When Neo defeated the Agents of the Matrix, he didn't stop the Matrix from being.  He created a better Matrix!  Because he realised that what he understood from "outside" the matrix, must be brought into harmony with that "inside" the matrix.  He existed at once outside of and inside of it.

From experience, I can tell you mustn’t isolate yourself from those around you due to your awakening.  Although you can see they are trapped, that is not reason to judge.  Their rules and regulations may control the aspect of you that still exists within their world, but it cannot control what is in your mind!

Do not allow the physical to trap the non-physical.  Do not seek one thing in place of the other.

Learn to exist without those rules.  And don't create new rules for yourself and others from what you find in your awakening!

Great message Marcus! Thanks for this.

It is also said in Sufi tradition that enlightment is like a turn of the wheel. You go high when the wheel turns half, but you come down to your beggining point when the wheel turns full. From this point you live your life in joy, helping others. After several years I found the same concept as Service To Others.

Also you're right when you mention Matrix wants us to fight with it. This is securing victory for the Matrix. You simply fight with an illusion or escape from an illusion.

Ferit

PS: Great! I'm listening to yahoo lunch radio when I'm in the office and guess what is playing right now while writing this message? Sympathy for The Devil (Rolling Stones) OK, message taken!

Neo, Ferit, erm, Apro, and all,

Maybe it's not so much a dislike, sadness, etc., for all those others that is defining this frustration as it is finding just how much you are able to engage love and care, and the harsh reality is that your sense of love and care is shared by so few in your environment, in the world at large, and this is what frustrates you. 

My own "falling out" with humanity came about seven or so years ago, the depth of malcontent that I felt for others not only led me to feelings of loathing, sadness, frustration, but more than anything else I was ASHAMED to be a human being.  Let me tell you, it took a long time to heal from my experience of separating myself from the "sheep pen".

I have slid down the backside of the "hill" Neomatrix refers to, though I'd call it a mountain, and a craggy one at that, and when I came to my feet I realized just how I needed to take action, and it wasn't as a "pen" liberator, and definitely not as a finger pointer. I recognized that the only thing I had dominion over was myself, and that if I was going to make it in this world I had better find something that did bring me JOY, and embrace it like it was my lifeline. And this I have done... of course this doesn't mean there aren't difficulties in my life and I walk around with sunshine blowing my skirt up over my eyes so that I can't see the injustice all around me, nor that I don't mouth off about the kwappy mess 3D Land is at times, but I have honed a space within myself that carefully loves my process, despite all the injustice.

Allowing others to define how one feels about themselves (sadness, anger, malcontent, feeling ashamed to-be) by virtue of their actions is a dirty trick to play on oneself. So, the question becomes--how do you feel about removing yourself from the "pen", are you unhappy with yourself for doing as much, or does it bring you joy that you were so able bodied/spirited to do as much? We live in a dualistic reality where there are two sides to each "coin", what side of yourself do you choose to embrace? Heads or tails?

You know, maybe part of the "separation" from the outside world is but one step in transitioning 3D, by rejecting this illusion we are giving clear Free Will signals that we are indeed ready to move on. Maybe if we're "in this world" too much, parlaying the illusion, and we say "Lemme out!" we couldn't be taken seriously... well, maybe not as seriously as one whose proven their intent with action. I think it's a natural course of action to move through the feelings talked about here, I've just learned that the frustration is extremely unhealthy. And if it's extremely unhealthy then to what vein of service is that?

Well said Aprogas.

Let's everybody find our own senses of joy, and cease feeding the beast. After all, you've/we've come this far, and for as far as we've gone there's no turning back.

I was just yesterday thinking about the subject of "All is an illusion". I myself still get a bit stumped up on this one because when I touch my environment it indeed touches back... and how can this not be relevant? I'm not made of stone, I don't move so slow that emotion passes me by... heeheehee, not by a long shot, but I can take my emotions by the gut and transmute them into something that does have meaning and relevance, even if it is only meaningful and relevant to me and none other.

Great insight from the Ra material Ferit.

Buddha's last words were--

Whether or not one embraces Buddha as a prophet these words speak a truth that is very relevant to our times and our journeys. How do you, how do any of us, when giving thought to the illusion and our places therein, how we desire to grow from and out of this, want to define our diligence, our vigilance? With frustration and discontent?  It can be done, lots of Wanderers are doing it, but I don't think it'll take us any further in our growth processes for having just turned around to take the umpteenth look at a flock of penned sheep, a place where we no longer instinctually belong.

So we've all got this capacity to love and care beyond this illusion, what do we do with it?

For myself, living through my sense of love and care, rather than another's lack of such, has brought to me more joy than I ever, ever, would've thought possible seven years ago when I was only and singularly ashamed of my humanness and my species.

EDIT--Marcus, interesting we both brought up Buddha! I hadn't seen your post before I submitted mine.

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
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Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
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If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

What a great thread, I've found myself agreeing with just about everything being said here and don't have much to add.

I totally understand where you're coming from Neomatrix, I've been feeling the same way for the last couple of years. However things have got a lot better recently because I've been making more and more friends on the same wavelength as I am, so I don't feel so isolated like I like used to.

But I also want to echo the sentiments of Maydovus which I think is extremely important. We have to learn to love and accept every other human being on this planet. Each person is on their own path and just because they're asleep today, doesn't mean they won't wake up tomorrow.

We mustn't fall into the trap of spiritual elitism which is pure ego. This is why I love Stuart Wilde so much, because he cuts through all the elitism bullshit and show's you what's really important.

If people like David Icke & Stuart Wilde are right then we've somehow got caught up in a matrix that sustains itself by feeding on negative emotional energies like hate, anger and fear.  The only way we can change or transend that is to become the opposite which is love.

If we allow ourselves to get caught in the ego trap of elitism and disliking others, then we start to feed the very thing we're trying to escape from.

Zonabi,

Your answer closely mirrors the conclusions of John Nash on how a group best functions.  The group does not function at its peak when everyone in the group has only their interests in mind.  Also, the group does not work to its peak when everyone in the group has the group's best intentions in mind.  The group works at its peak when everyone in the group does what is best for themselves and what is best for the group. 

So as you said, we must do what is best for ourselves and what is best for the group. 

NEOMATRIX:

I know what you mean.  Sitting there in solitude...contemplating the discussions you observe or partake in with others.  Realizing that you cannot relate because you understand how trivial their thoughts are.  Their comments on the latest sitcom on television, who won the game the night before, which candidate is apt to get the job done.  You cannot relate to them on this level because you have come to the profound realization that it doesn't matter. 

You are walking along this path of truth.  And on this path you will surely come to a point where you understand how little the masses comprehend, how trivial their conversations are, and how little they care for one another.  (Keep this last point in mind)

Now take another step forward.  Remember how you were once couped in the same pen.  Believing the same things these people believe.  How empty it made you feel.  These people feel that same emptiness.  The question is will you take a pause on this path to understand these facts, or will you stumble and allow your sight to be blurred....distorted? 

Let's assume you take the pause.  You have now accepted the fact that these people have no grasp of the truth and as a result, have little regard/love for one another.  Are you going to revert to your old ways...finding yourself locked back in the sheep pen?  Because if you have no regard for others, even the lowest of them, then surely you are bound by the same chains that keep these people in mental and spiritual enslavement. 

The more steps one takes towards the Truth, the more he or she finds the path riddled with obstacles and negative entities.  Are you going to allow one of these obstacles/negative entities to obstruct your path and guide you back to the pen of sheep, or are you going to transcend their wickedness and deny them of their deceit? 

Kindest regards,
WMHAOI