"Success IS failure" (Page 2 of 2)

The less I know, the wiser I become.

titmouse, you wrote on another thread (Revelations of the Insider) about your work too:

I would like to hear more about this story, and also the answers to your questions-lala

Let me give it a try.

I find people, or should I say, the universe aids in me being in the right place for the right needs. For four years I have been finding work via synchronicity.  I have a fair understanding how it works and have found an interesting path that seems to be leading to amazing spiritual growth.  Some people say that guides help us; one customer said they believe in guardian angels and asked me if I was theirs.  All I can say is I end up in very interesting and timely places working for special cases.  I say I work for those who don't have enough.  What I do is the complicated work that has been left undone--for one reason or another. It is  usually not the physical work that draws me to the people I find, but a spiritual void in their lives, and I seem to be called upon by forces greater than my conscious awareness.

In the case refered to here, the lady told me about some deep aspects to her life and the life of her house.  She said the reason she called me is that I left my card on her door hours after she had decided to call someone in to do a complicated job.  She said it was shocking that the "carefulcarpenter" had left his card, as though there was a psychic connection between us that day.  When we sat out on the short brick wall that borders her property, along the street, she told me more.  She said she believed the house was haunted, or jinxed, and had been for three generations. She informed me that the people who owned the house in the 60's had had problems finishing the house and that the husband had killed the wife in the house. Her parents bought the house and planned to finish restoring the property, but they also had many relationship problems that ended in divorce, and they never finshed the work they planned.  She had been raised there and her father left her the house as an inheritance.  She and her husband had been trying to work on the house themselves, but she came down with cancer 4-5 years earlier and she was finding it difficult to finish the job. She was having great difficulty healing; the lesions on her chest would not heal.  And she said her husband left townto go surfing in Southern California for a couple weeks.

What she wanted the carefulcarpenter to do was to remove a toilet from the center bathroom of the house. She believed that it was the source of all the problems over the years and her husband had not done as she asked, so when the day he left she decided to call someone.  I place my card soon after on her door.  She told me originally over the phone that she had plenty of work for me, yet it took her alwost two weeks before she actually called back and committed to hiring me.  In response to her tales of doom and possession I replied, "Well, you called the right person to do the job."  She said, "It seems as though God has sent you to me."

When I was finished removing the sink and placing it in the garage I called my good old friend from college, Ms. G (the woman I might have married under other circumstances), on my cell phone and asked her what color the toilet is that I just removed from the bathroom of a rich lady.  She thought it was rather a weird question and relied, "You want me to guess what color a toilet is?  I said, "Yes, of course, I just thought you might like to hear a strange and synchronistic story.  She guessed, "Periwinkle??".  "Yes, of course!! Periwinkle".  I told her briefly about the reasons and told her it was the first toilet I've ever been asked to remove, and that, of course it was periwinkle.  "Now" the other bathroom, the kids bathroom, what color are the walls?"  She said"  "Periwinkle??"  "Yes, periwinkle!!".

In the last year periwinkle has been a clue whenever a profound synchronicity occurs with either Ms.G and/or myself.  The story behind this event was much more than just coincidence.

After removing the toilet, the lady had me do some other skilled work such as drilling he new cabinet doors and placing handles on them. Then I varnished a few straight-grained fir doors, and painted a wall.  After two days of work she said she couldn't afford me any longer. I said thank you and as I was leaving her husband came home and before I had cleaned up and loaded my truck he came out and thanked me for helping them out. The tilework, the kid's bathroom vanity, and a few other things she mentioned were set on hold.  I often get promised many things up front from people who later change their minds for reasons related to money.  Of course the Mexican pool workers kept on working on the new pool.

I succeeded in helping the woman with a complicated and strange job, but in the end my good work left me feeling a failure.  She made it very clear that I was just too expensive!  ( I charge about 1/3 what it would have cost to have a plumber come out to do a small job); and no plumber would have been so kind and loving to her as I was those two days. 

"Why am I free?"   I manage my own time; I do the complicated work and it is difficult to find people like me, so I can always find work; I work where I want to work; and I know myself.

"Why don't people recognize that I am free?"  I perceive this because people don't seem to ask me questions that indicate they recognize my freedom.  I suppose this statement has always had some truth to it--"To know one is to be one".  A recent comment from a master landscaper/designer lead me to make this statement--"You recognize my mastery because you too are a master".  He smiled.    A master recognizes confidence; the insecure see arrogance.

"What do I know that the feeders don't?"  I know myself; they don't really know who they are or what they want--this is why they feed on the positive energy of others.  They know how to play on the hidden needs of their targets.  Those who hire me and explain how they really don't have money, or how I'm not valuable or worthy by their standards,  don't realize I came into their world to help them.  They don't realize that my skills actually make their houses worth far more than the hourly rate they pay me.  If they were as generous as they want to think of themselves when they hire a handyman who needs work, they would make out really well with whatever work I do.  They just don't realize what is right in front of their faces. They don't realize I am far less expensive than a therapist, yet am willing to lend an attentive and loving ear.

Example: my current customer is very aware that he is going to make 4 times the appreciation in his home for the money he spends with me.  He is not a feeder, and he has shared some astounding facts about the appraisals he has had.  He is a kind man who knows the worth of a hardworking handyman.  I give him something he can't get from the other professionals he hires--love, compassion, and true admiration.  His carpenter son died three years ago; his wife last year.  He never really knew his son, he said.  I hugged him the other day after he gave me half of a cake a friend baked him.  He's worth millions, yet he recognizes the value of an honest common man.

I hope that adaquately answers some of my questions for you. 

Thanks, titmouse, that was a very good story and your confidence in truth and right-living is very inspiring to me, I am at a low ebb with feeling my freedom and independence right now, because I have had everything that I was doing removed from my life. I know that this is an opportunity for freedom, yet I have terrible anxiety about what to do next. Until recently, I felt like you do, that I go synchronistically to fulfill the next task in my life development, however, it has been awhile, and nothing has popped up, even with research and allowing. So, your tales are inspiring; it must be nice to know exactly who you are and what you are doing here-lala

titmouse,
I guess that's why you chose your name. The littlest mice will wear away at the biggest obstacles in their paths, they can bring down an entire house, but they also perservere in storing and conserving food (energy) to survive.-lala