Topic: ...chemical memory control, and loss of control due to "age"...
...here's a problem I'm having, and I'm looking for an explanation and possible help.
...ever since 1997 or so (the beginning of my epilepsy and anti-convulsant medicating), a problem has been rearing its head. A certain specific phrase has been trying to pop up into my conscious memory. This phrase, I b3li3v3, concerns the nature of memory and how it is organized and recognized by the conscious mind. The problem is, this phrase is acting like a repeating number sequence or a communication with a higher self. It comes up, almost makes it to consciousness out of the soup of memory, then gets overwritten or trampled by other memories of a trivial nature, or a distraction pops up (usually music that has an emotional connection to me.), and the phrase gets spray-painted over. I keep trying to grab it before it gets lost....but I'm never fast enough to recognize the pattern of the words, say them out loud so that they land in short-term memory, and write them down so I don't lose them.
...right now, I'm having trouble even typing this into the computer. My hands are shaking powerfully, and distractions are popping up like popcorn in a movie theatre.
...can anyone direct me toward information about memory organization in the mind? I think it has something to do with the chemical in the mind that acts like a traffic cop, letting one called-for memory thru and then holding the related uncalled-for memories back so that the conscious mind can recognize it. Can anyone help?