What the hell is the Illuminati?

Thought I would share this.  It was originally posted in the alt.illuminati newsgroup back in 2001.  I'm always tempted to use it every time I encounter someone ignorant of the term "Illuminati" but as you can see it's not exactly a complete explanation.  Most people here have hopefully advanced somewhere beyond the depressing-sounding "step 9".  It's still pretty funny, though.

[typos and all included, but I switched the original messages to the top so it reads more or less in chronological order]

"James Bowls" <sonicfreedom@netzero.net> schreef in bericht
news:99nt00$1gh92$1@ID-58621.news.dfncis.de...
>
> "Groman" <groman@f2s.com> wrote in message
> news:99gopc$27r$1@slb6.atl.mindspring.net...
> > > The truth is this :
> >
> > There is?(truth that is)
> >
> > > you don't want to know.
> >
> > I think this is for me to decide, but since you're out here making
> > subjective
> > judgements for me, I might as well go find out for myself.
> >
>
> then go out and find out for yourself
>
> dont say you werent warned
>
>
>
> > > > No really, what is it? The name is peculiar,but from what I can
> gather,
> > > > it's a consiparcy cult, but whenever it's a cult in conspiracy or a
> cult
> > > > claiming that there is some bigger conspiracy I couldn't get from a
> mere
> > 5
> > > > minute look around on the net.
> > > >
> > > > I'm not a conspiratist in the most common sense of the word. I'm in
> > > > a quest for free thinking(hmm, i avoid using the term satanism to
> > boycott
> > > > that stupid bunco sheet, long story). So I'm sorta interested in the
> > > > going ons of the world(which sometimes unfortunately includes
talking
> to
> > > > Jahova's Witnesses). So really, what the hell is Illuminati?
> > > >
> > > > Groman.

It's funny the way things work; chronologically the steps go like this:

1) They think Illuminati, or conspiracies, are just games, jokes.
Some don't find it funny anymore after awhile; and forget about it.

2) Some like this kind of humor very much, and continue to talk about it.

3) Somehow they get attracted by it's weirdness, and are just curious and
decide to
investigate furthermore...

4) After a while they start to understand that the basic concept of the
joke, is that it
is NOT a joke. The humor behind the conspiracy is the best way the
conspirators have
found to make people forget about them. (step 1!)

5) They start to realize it isn't funny at all anymore; and that it's
potentially dangerous.
Some stop here; because they get scared. ("jeez... I thought it was all a
joke. I had been
warned"). Needless to say these people, if they give up the search, will be
gifted for "having
seen the absurdity of it all".

6) Others go on searching, driven by passion for the truth and
curiosity.Some are driven
because of a sense of disgust against the conspirators. Some are driven
because of pure
hate against the conspirators.

7) That's when the conspirators start to act, and intimidate the searchers.
Many will fall.
Many will stop the search, and go on with their life (and get a "second
chance")

8) Then there will come a point of no return. You will have to decide
whether or not you
take the red pill.

9) Then you will know the truth... and you will go on with your life. The
only thing that will
have changed, is a sense of disgust of it all. A sense that you don't
understand what you have
been shown. A feeling of despair. You will try hide it. Perhaps for the
whole of your life;
but you will not anymore get any chance to live. AT THIS TIME it is NOT the
conspirators
who will "f*ck you up"; but yourself. Your subconsciousness, having been
told the truth, will
not be able to live a normal life. You will f*ck your own life. You will
have no passion for
anything, no emotion, no sense of reality of whatsoever. Suicide seems the
solution, although
that would be too easy. You just go on with your life, hoping that one day
you will have the
courage to face what you have been shown.

As long as you are not at step 8, and haven't take the red pill, you will
have a second chance.
PLEASE don't yell and scream "I WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH"; it is very easy to
know.
The conspirators intimidate you a bit, (more like 'are you sure to want to
know what we're
doing to you??') but if you say "yes I want the truth" ... you WILL see it.

It is a very specific thing that you need to do, but with a bit of research
you will find it for yourself.

Don't do it man, have a fun life, full of sex, love, alcohol, work, money,
food, ... and do not
ask questions about this. You will regret it.
No need to say I've been at step 9 for a few years by now.

justme