Re: implants

Hi ani-waya, you're in good company here. What you have in your arm sounds very much like an implant, the only other explanation being an infected splinter or scrape. But considering the history of your family and ear noises I think the second possibility is more dubious than the first. Short of surgery or some exotic method of jamming, not much can be done about implants.

In my case the best one can do is make sure they don't interfere with your thoughts or emotions, which means observing yourself and nipping any external influence in the bud before they manifest through you. In this way you render the implant ineffective short of its monitoring capability. As far as monitoring goes, the less they can apply what intelligence they gather the less you should worry about it.

The threat of monitoring often does more damage than monitoring itself, and being both self-observant  and good-natured goes a long way toward quarantining the secondary effects of an implant such as paranoia and stress. I suppose you could always try intending/requesting that all implants be rendered inoperable in ways that do not harm your health, often that will lead you synchronistically to possible solutions. But be cautious about people who claim they can remove implants through some type of psychic surgery, many are charlatans and others are portals for demonic energies.

The most important thing I learned is that even though they can abduct you when you sleep, during the day you are the master if only you center your awareness on the moment and proceed with precision and a heightened sense of awareness. The positive attitude, you know like trying to see the beauty in things and keeping a sense of humor, these work to reinforce an aware state of mind just as a good immune system supports physical agility. The opposite would be submitting to depression, obsession, paranoia, fear, doom and gloom -- which is often the types of things the programmers try to trigger you for. On a spiritual level these make it easier for them to get deeper into your mind/reality and install their control mechanism...which can quickly become a downward spiral. So keep your eyes open and your chin up, and you'll get through this.

Acquiring fringe knowledge is like digging for diamonds in a mine field.

Re: implants

Thank-you wandering 1 and monalk. Just writing the stuff down seemed to lighten me in someway. I have never had a problem being out of the mainstream until I started to really work on myself. Things have gone pretty fast. Sort of like a lot of it was already there just waiting for me to look. Guess I overloaded myself a few times. Knowing that there is a place to kick back and not have to carefully mull over the topics that can be brought up is a nice feeling. There are a few good people in my life, but even they will only go so far and at times I just long for a real conversation. Nurture as well as nature has made me a quiet person but it seems the time for silence is passing for me. Caution however still runs strong. Again, thank-you.

Re: implants

ani-waya,

Welcome to NR!

Words cannot convey the feelings I've had since I read your post yesterday... to say I'm sorry that you are having this difficulty would be an understatement, because it just makes me want to cry. And cry sad tears, not my usual tears of joy.... and that's okay, I'm just remembering.

I can identify with where you're at because I've been there... in that overwhelming feeling of helplessness. It may've been years ago that I felt this way, but I've never forgotten... it's been like a hot poker in my arse to overcome all that impales my native and genuine being. My core. My heart does go out to you. I'm glad you've decided to post what must've been difficult to share, and I hope that you'll find the comfort and support here that your heart desires.

Most difficult of all, but appropriate, to share with you is that I was once told that one of my implants was used as a tool of programming, programming me to suicidal thoughts.

Yeah, since I've been 15 or 16 (now 46) I've heard that programming playing--

"Stockpile pills, you'll just fall asleep and it'll AAAALL be over with."

"NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOU, you know it's true, you'll not be missed. DO IT!"

"Go ahead take your own life, you can make up for it later in another life."

"You don't have to be here, just walk in front of a bus."

Just walk in front of a bus?... lord have mercy. GACK!

It's a real bitch piece of programming.

Oddly enough though, it's made me stronger. LOL! I guess it's like the saying "What doesn't kill you will make you stronger."

Ahem... I know that last bit "What doesn't kill you will make you stronger" may seem shallow and trite, but nothing could be further from the truth from where I sit.

Do you have any idea why you might be being implanted? Aside of the military affiliation?

Let me help you out with this one wink .

Believe it or not, it could be because you, like many other of us here, are "the bomb". Your potential to be a shining light of love and the bearer of knowledge is unacceptable to the hyperdimensional powers that be. So they overlay that righteous soul/core-being with kwap, kwap, and then even more kwap.

Did you ever think of it this way? That you were too "perfect in your form" and had to be dealt with?

If you haven't, then please do... it's better than the alternative, yes?

It was quite an eye-opener for me to realize that maybe one of the reasons I was implanted and programmed was because I would otherwise be part of a force that serves to shatter the matrix and ignorance.

Like montalk said, once you've been implanted with a device/programming it's pretty much a done deal, but you just can't let it get the best of you.

I'll tell you... meekishly so, there are a number of times I've been on the floor, pounding the floor with my fists (Drama Queen big_smile ), yelling and screaming and crying, praying my otherwise sweet patootie off for a CLEAR path to my core-being. Those were real "Father, why have you foresaken me?" moments. Hard moments. Very alone moments. Yet, somewhere along the way I was heard, by whomever is more powerful than hyperdimensionals, and I found my way out of the helplessness. I may not have disbanded the implants, but I've found a way to live with it.

You just can't let it get the BEST of you.

Anyway, if I may be of help just ask, you are not alone lovey.

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
------
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
------
If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

lol

Re: implants

Auendove,

I've had some seemingly-external, yet very subtle, negative ideas popping into my head for a long time but for some reason it never "clicked" with me that this sort of scenario might be the explanation.  I never consciously thought about it much.  I'm certainly not perfect, but definitely feel an incredible sense of "mission" to do the sort of thing I do.   So, now that I read your post my feeling is that you're probably right on with what you're saying.   It just makes sense.

140 (edited by Auendove 2005-08-27 08:19:04)

Re: implants

Hi morningsun,

morningsun76 wrote:

It just makes sense.

Oh my, how I chuckled when I read this lol . It's not often I'm told I make sense... thank you.

morningsun76 wrote:

I'm certainly not perfect...

Ahhhh, the old and odd stigmatic perception of human imperfection... honey, you are perfect in your form, even with faults you are perfect in your form. Please know that there is something of you that is indeed perfect, without guilting yourself about as much. You don't have to tell others about it if you're uncomfortable, I certainly don't go around telling people I think I'm perfect in my form, but please know this within yourself. It's very liberating.

No shame, eh? wink

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
------
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
------
If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

lol

Re: implants

Auendove wrote:

please know this within yourself. It's very liberating.

No shame, eh? wink

Thanks Auendove!!

Great comments!

Re: implants

You are welcome wandering1, and thank you too.

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
------
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
------
If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

lol

Re: implants

wandering1 wrote:

Thanks Auendove!!

Great comments!

Excuse me, wandering1, but I believe Auendove was trying to make the point that I am perfect in my form, not you ... so there's not really any need for you to thank her for her comments.   I understand that you may have been tired and/or intoxicated when you posted this, so I guess we can overlook the error ... this time.  Please do try to be more careful in the future, though!

big_smile    (evil grin)

Seriously though, you're right Auendove and good point.

144 (edited by Auendove 2005-08-29 04:58:48)

Re: implants

morningsun76 wrote:

Excuse me, wandering1, but I believe Auendove was trying to make the point that I am perfect in my form, not you ... so there's not really any need for you to thank her for her comments.   I understand that you may have been tired and/or intoxicated when you posted this, so I guess we can overlook the error ... this time.  Please do try to be more careful in the future, though!

big_smile    (evil grin)

morningsun,

Whoa, dude, are you joking around with wandering1 with this comment? I ask because it looks to me like you're not, even given the smiley and notation.

We are All perfect in our form!

morningsun76 wrote:

Seriously though, you're right Auendove and good point.

Okay, then... seriously, your words strike me as biting, joking or not. Take it easy, okay?

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
------
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
------
If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

lol

145 (edited by lyra 2005-08-29 05:02:28)

Re: implants

Auendove wrote:
morningsun76 wrote:

Excuse me, wandering1, but I believe Auendove was trying to make the point that I am perfect in my form, not you ... so there's not really any need for you to thank her for her comments.   I understand that you may have been tired and/or intoxicated when you posted this, so I guess we can overlook the error ... this time.  Please do try to be more careful in the future, though!

big_smile    (evil grin)

morningsun,

Whoa, dude, are you joking around with wandering1 with this comment? I ask because it looks to me like you're not.

Um, yeah, actually he is joking.  That's what "evil grin" was in reference to.


We are All perfect in our form!

morningsun76 wrote:

Seriously though, you're right Auendove and good point.

Okay, then... seriously, your words strike me as biting. Take it easy, okay?

Biting?  He's kidding.  Chill.   There's no need to tell somebody to take it easy when they're totally kidding around.    Think about it Auendove.....he's saying wandering1 was intoxicated or tired......who would say that in seriousness?

Also, I happen to know his humor at this point, so trust me, he's joking.   Not everybody shares the same sense of humor, but it's usually safe to assume that when somebody says something over the top followed by "evil grin" or "grin" or big_smile or something to that effect, then they're kidding.

I'M a little touchy about this myself only because in the past, I've punctuated my sentences with big_smile 's and smile 's to indicate light heartedness and joking around, only to be totally ripped apart by a poster who has no sense of humor, who shall remain nameless.   One would think that by putting (grin) or big_smile or Evil Grin that the message would be conveyed, but I guess that's not always the case. 

morningsun76 is a good guy, so let's all be nice!

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

Re: implants

lyra wrote:

Also, I happen to know his humor at this point, so trust me, he's joking. smile

Okay.

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
------
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
------
If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

lol

147

Re: implants

Auendove wrote:
lyra wrote:

Also, I happen to know his humor at this point, so trust me, he's joking. smile

Okay.

I'm being serious, for real, he's a good guy, so no worries.  !  He's somebody that Tom and I email with off the forum.   One time a long time ago he said something to me on the forum in total dry, sarcastic humor, and I didn't know his humor yet at that point so I emailed him asking him, "hey....were you being serious??"  feeling sad  about it.  But he was just kidding.  Now I know, so I can recognize that humor a mile away!  big_smile 

He's kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiding!!!!   

tongue

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit ... what a ride!"  - Anonymous
-----
"I get by with a little help from my (higher density) friends."
-----

Re: implants

lyra wrote:

He's kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiding!!!!   

tongue

Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! lol

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
------
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
------
If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

lol

Re: implants

Yes, was kidding ... didn't occur to me it might be misinterpreted.

Sorry for helping to take the thread off-topic ... back to implants, then?

Re: implants

big_smile

My ears are still clear of the ringing and thrumming... I am surprised this condition is remaining, and really happy.

morningsun76 wrote:

This is a very distinct and unusual switching/clicking/popping sensation coming from within my head.

I have been meaning to ask you morningsun if these sounds are alike the sound of softly tapping an egg on a surface, like little chkkk, chkkk, chkkk sounds?

I've heard sounds coming from inside my head too, but they sound just like what I've described.

Maybe our heads are like the Cosmic Egg... lol

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
------
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance.
------
If you spin around on your chair really fast, things around here will make a lot more sense.

lol