Hello 3,7,127,
Could you please notice (for your own clarification, not for me) the following things durring your interaction:
-how were you breathing (shallow? deep? slow, etc)
-what was your posture: contact with earth, feet relaxed? tense? knees? neck relaxed? tense? back straight or curved. head hanging heavily in the empty or aligned and supported lightly by the neck, eyes, relaxed? squinted? tense?...Look stuck on one spot or freely scanning the horison from time to time.
-your inner dialogue: you were relaxed inner silence? or a few words turning in loops? a defensive dialogue about the 'self'? judgements about yourself, light humour? etc..
-were you hungry, just normal?, eaten too much? did you have lots of coffees, or sugar, etc
888
i try to help put your attention on the elements listed above (posture, breath, inner silence/dialogue), contact with the earth, etc, because these elements are extremely crucial to how one FEELS at any time. Life is before all a feeling.
I am doing the same practical tasks of stalking my position (the things above) lately and am absolutely amazed at how a tense neck or an imbecilic loop inner dialogue can go ustopped and unexamined for hours andthus completely defining everything: our mood, our energy circultaion, our sense of humour and dettachment and even the circumstances that happed to pop-up around us.
When one has tracked ones, twice three times their position then they notice that the energy blocking/draining attitudes are repetitious in a routine and that they are not that many (but are persistent).
So now you've tracked and stalked yourself and you have a more or less clear picture of "what gets" you. The next strategic (warrior always strategic-and humour and delicateness/elegance--with these three you'll go very far:) step is to purposefully disrupt the routine when it appears. You don't go: "ok, there i go--perfect, straight, relaxed, deep slow breath, etc.." because somethings has "gotten" you and you may be just on your way to repeat the pattern and get tense and loose energy. So it is hard to fix all at once at such moments. What you do is you trickilly change only one element of the whole 'position'. I've learned that a habit needs only one of it's elements missing or slightly changed and it looses its force over you.This is to apply "not doing" (where "doing" is your usual reactions and routines. It can also be seen as Introducing an Element of Dissonance. Remember, a habit, a person (your perception of it), an idea, needs all of its elements to have power over you.
In this sense, Harry Potter is is not at all to be taken lightly: they were teaching kids to change an element of the whole in something or someone that scared them. Next thing they knew was a caricature that made them laugh.
In a missaligned tense posture ane may look/brush the horizon to look for advice there or to break tense eyes fixation, or may start to breath deeply on purpose (you can never worry and breath slowly and deeply in the same time, not possible), can moove frozn feet even among people and feel the earth, your imagination is the limit! You are magical being, it is syntactical commands and the "social order"that dictate you to stiffen but that's only when you forget that you can change things.
It may be mentioned also that it does not mean obvious "strange" behaviour or need for attention. It is your strategy to be free. Very important to my feeling is that one should never get disappointed by falure and should always advance in "small steps" at a time. Delicateness, elegance summon power and energy.
Concerning the "suggestions" by your two fellows in your story. Probably you should know that what we see is dictated by what description we uphold. If you may find yourself a little low on energy someone can come and force a descritption upon you (you have a beast, etc) and then it can make you perceive things or hook your energy into part of your body or an idea, etc.
Descriptions are like software--they can define how things function, what input triggers what reaction, etc. That's why in the MAtrix was emphasized that the residual self image is nothing but a description, a program. Religion is such a description too and it collect great great crops of guilt, docility and fear from time immemorial. The mind is the hard disk where they write the softawres, the descriotions of how things are, but then the rebels say Free Your Mind. The mind is freed through stopping mental loops (especially the ones that are worries for the "self"). Then if this is practiced regularly a delicious inner silence give place for different things to be perceived and to become guiding force.
They want us overfed with their syntax of the Cult of "Me". Then we get into inner dialogue, postures, no breath, judging, petty, stiff, sedated, stuck and this whole thing functions as a current in the sense that it renews in a chain reaction..Stopping the current from time to time. Introducing dissonance elements. Not doings of the self. Cahnging a routine on purpose. Small things, smiling to people lightly from time to time. Then you gain a little more energy, you React less to people and things that get you, and then something else starts to flow--another current--but this time it's a current of energy. And the other current is the so called "river of shit". You can recognise the river of shit flowing in you when everything around looks shitty, world, people, all. But then you are worrior and you are never disappointed and you act strategically. You take a pause. If one persist they say we never go back to the oozing wormth of the river of shit. And you are vibrant with energy:)
hope this can be of any use to anyone,
your fellow traveller
wrote. It's sad, but these people exist. It's like, what the hell went wrong in their lives???? For me the intriguing question is, Why do they gravitate to Christianity, and oftentimes *Catholicism* in general?? Very interesting indeed.
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