Topic: Au Revoir, Pere Grand
Dear Grampa
I’m sorry you had to leave this morning. I wish I could have said good-bye today like I planned. I was going to give you some “Christmas socks” (remember Mr. Bean’s?). But I understand. I know how much you hated for us to see you that way. I just wanted to thank you, you know, one more time, before I left. For Everything. And apologize again for waiting until you got sick this summer before making you a priority in my life...for making “a stranger of myself”, like you said (and thank you for forgiving me in the same breath...and for understanding, like you always did...no matter what).
I was also going to thank you for hanging on until your party last weekend. I know how hard it was for you to do that. I don’t know how you managed to pull yourself out of that space one last time. I was hoping you would/could...and you did, for the whole afternoon, no less. We all just wanted to have a special day for you so bad. To let you know how much you mean to us, you know? And it was Good Times, wasn’t it? Especially when you asked us all to come together in your room. It was the greatest gift you ever could have given...I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that. Gawd...that’s my last memory of you now...waving good-bye with that big ol’ smile on your face. Did you do that on purpose...make that my last memory? You would do that, wouldn’t you. I bet you did. I was also going to ask you today if you liked your surprise. There were so many people around I didn’t really get a chance to ask after we gave it to you. I know you said you didn’t like surprises but I hope you liked that one. Your daughter and your great granddaughter and I worked pretty hard on it over the past few weeks...and put a lot of love into it, too. I’m glad you were able to see it.
And I really am glad we had so much time together these last six months. Don’t worry about the bad days, okay? (No regrets, remember? Those are your words.) It’s the good days I’ll remember most anyway. You know the ones...the days you could smile, even laugh, despite it all. I could tell then that it was really you cuz you had that twinkle in your eye that we all know and love so well. And before that, when we could tease each other and have a coffee together and sneak outside for cigarettes...and share all those memories and kisses...and all that honesty.
I’m going to miss you SO MUCH, Grampa. So much.
I’ll still go to go to the bush tonight cuz I know you’d want me to. At least I don’t have to leave you behind now. You can come with me if you want. And, yes, I will see if I can find my Peace. I’ll keep looking, okay? I Promise. I do hope you found yours in the end.
Tout mon amour,
La Fille de Pépé
PS - Give my love to Gramma and Aunty-I, will ya?
PPS - I hope you find my message. I’ll leave it for you somewhere where I think you will. Did you get my last one? If not, you can find it over here http://forum.noblerealms.org/viewtopic.php?id=5903.