Topic: Closer to the truth as a child...

I'm starting to realize that when I was younger that I felt closer and more in-tuned to these strange occurences that I am trying to understand now as a more "mature" adult. 

When I first browsed this site one evening, I was astonished read that someone used to contemplate eternity.  I used to do this as a child, at night before I fell asleep.  It brought on a very powerful and mesmorizing feeling in me.  I would think about the concept of infinity and eternity.  After about 5 minutes of this, something would "turn on" in me.  I'm so intrigued by this!!!  I have tried to get that intense feeling, but to no avail.  I can't make it click anymore like I used to be able to as a child.  During this time, I remember flying in space somehow...something like stars seemed to pass by me as I flew into infinity.  Yes, strange.  Imagination??  I don't know... 

This also gets me to think of the times I use to cry in my bed at night.  I grew up Catholic so learned about the concept of hell early on.  I would get that feeling of eternity and then attach the concept of eternal suffering.  It scared the living shit out of me.  I used to pray and pray to God that he would not send me there.

Re: Closer to the truth as a child...

When I was a small child I seemed to have some automatic concept of eternity because I naturally believed  that peoples course of progression in life was to eventually learn everything there is to know about anything. This was, of course, before I realized that adults choose a 'profession' and generally limit their attentions to whatever narrow field that may be. I can distinctly remember being taken aback by this realization that nobody eventually learns everything and can even recall immediately 'looking down' on people (everyone in the world) for never attaining such a state of omnipotence.

I am as is Void.

Re: Closer to the truth as a child...

I really recommend this guy EQ's excellent meditation called the "Infinity Breathing Technique"

Steps for the Technique:

0) Suggestion - Play some suitable background noise/music, my recommendations are (feel free to add recommendations!): The Drone Zone, you can find this Winamp Internet Radio Station if you search for it on, The Theta/Delta CD that accompanies the RI course, and The Mind Meditation audio files that were made available in the recommendations section.

1) Preparation - With optional background music playing quietly, otherwise, with no outside noise (or as little as possible), lie down, flat on back, head on pillow(s) (or flat if you prefer), under a blanket if it is cold, in as good of health as possible, no mental or emotional concerns, perfectly content, sleepy but not too sleepy, on a comfortable bed, and begin doing the light-breathing technique if you know how to do it. If not, begin breathing in and out slowly, in an effort to slow your breathing, your heartbeat and the natural pulse of the body, pausing between breathing both in and out.

2) Contemplation - At this point, the mental "realization" of infinity is engaged, such that our continuously expanding perception of infinity is achieved by linking it to our breath. Before linking them, we may try to imagine how vastly incomprehensible infinity is all on it's own, ie., imagining oneself travelling forever in a single direction of space. Now, in the case of this technique, we will use the concept of imagining oneself expanding and becoming infinitely larger as long as our breath in will last, and imagining oneself contracting and becoming infinitely smaller as long as our breath out will last. We will always build upon the point we had gotten to in our previous set of in-breaths and out-breaths, such that we will always perceive ourselves as having travelled further into macro or micro-scopia with each consecutive breath than the time before.

3) Actualization - Now that the technique is properly perceived and all variables have been set in favour of the attempt succeeding, we begin with a breath out, and a small-scale association to go with it. We will imagine that as we breathe out, we are shrinking down to the size of an atom, and we watch everything around us "zoom by" as we do so. We see ourselves as being a speck. This can be used as the "starting point" that we will never return to until just before the end of the technique. The breathing-micro/macroscopia association truly begins from this point on. At the first breath in, we will imagine ourselves growing from the point of being an atom all the way to encompassing this entire planet, solar system, or universe, depending on how far we can imagine ourselves expanding while we breathe in as much as we can, as slowly as we can. The next breathe out will bring us well past the atom we were starting out as, to a point where we can see that this atom in fact represents the "casing" of a universe one level "below" our own. We will zoom right past it to the point where what had seemed so small before now seems incredibly large, continuing on until we are out of breath. The next breath in will work the same way but in the opposite direction. We will zoom right past the brink of the universe to a point where it seems as an atom inside of another universe one level "up". The next set of breaths will bring us "two" levels down and up, then "three", and so on and so forth.

4) Metamorphosis - This final step, in a sense, "actualizes the actuality". It is crucial to perceive the "flip" points during this technique, where the very small suddenly seem very large and vice versa, because you must at some point remove the notion of zooming in or out X amount of levels, and simply zoom in and out as far as possible, always further, feeling the "flip" points as "ridges" as though you were sliding through a cylinder with performations, kind of like a cylindrical Ruffles Chip! These ridges will then begin to smoothen, as One and Infinity begin to collapse into one another, and by this point, if successful, you will surely not be feeling your physical body anymore. You are essentially engaging this technique to pull the "Two" (I have talked about this in other recent posts) back into "One", by making two Infinities into One Infinity, and it is by doing so that you can enter the Void, the source and destination of all reality, more easily this way than perhaps through some other techniques.

5) Id - If the metamorphosis is successful, your ego, now without anything to associate itself to, transforms into Id, and you can experience the subconscious bliss of total connectness with a kind of consciousness that will become less foggy and hazy with practise and experience. In this place, if one can maintain it, the source of what makes RV and RI work is contained, and it is here best we can see how seamless they are and how they can be combined.

N.B - what I want people to do here, when they arrive, is to "speculate", just float and let the information pass through you naturally as you do not need to engage yourself in order to speculate here like you do in the "real world". This place assumes you have an inquiring mind, as this is the source of evolution, and satiates your curiousity insofar as it will believe you are able to "digest" it. If you didn't get as much as you liked the first time around, go back! If you go back and don't get anymore, give it some time, then go back!