The bad news is that she blocked me.

The good news is that while I was searching for the worlds most depressing songs to fit my mood at the time, I stumbled upon this gem.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwLumdtdpzk

And you get the lyrics for free. In Italian and English.

Quando sono solo
sogno all'orizzonte
e mancan le parole
si lo so che non c'e luce
in una stanza quando manca il sole
se non ci sei tu con me
Su le finestre
mostra a tutti il mio cuore
che hai acceso
chiudi dentro me
la luce che
hai incontrato per strada

Con te partiro
paesi che non ho mai
veduto e vissuto con te
adesso si li vivro
Con te partiro
su navei per mari
che io lo so
no no non esistono piu
con te io li vivro

Quando sei lontana
sogno all'orizzonte
e mancan le parole
e io si lo so
che sei con me con me
tu mia luna tu sei qui con me
mio sole tu sei qui con me
con me con me con me

Con te partiro
paesi che non ho mai
veduto e vissuto con te
adesso si li vivro
Con te partiro
che io lo so
no no non esistono piu
con te io li rivivro
Con te partiro
su navi per mari
che io lo so
no no non esistono piu
con te io li rivivro
Con te partiro
lo con te

When I'm alone
I dream on the horizon
And words fail
Yes, I know there is no light
In a room where the sun is absent
If you are not with me
At the windows
Show everone my heart
Which you set alight
Enclose within me
The light you
Encountered on the street

I'll go with you
To countries I newer
Saw and shared with you
Now, yes, I shall experience them
I'll go with you
On ships across seas
Which, I know,
No, no, exist no longer
With you I shall experience them

When you are far away
I dream on the horizon
And words fail
And yes, I know
That you are with me
You, my moon, are here with me
My sun, you are here with me

I'll go with you
To countries I never
Saw and shared with you
Now, yes, I shall experience them
I'll go with you
On ships across seas
Which, I know,
No, no, exist no longer
With you I shall experience them again
I'll go with you
On ships across seas
Which, I know,
No, no, exist no longer
With you I shall experience them again
I'll go with you
I with you

I got a bucket full'o'tears and I feel fantastic. Merry Christmas.

Lord, I wish I have had the online self-control you do. I've so often 'pushed the button' without really thinking it through... oh, man.

I hit that button

Peace.

Between 2005 and now quite a bit of time has passed.  She might have changed her outlook on life considering her experiences in those 2 or 3 years.  Perhaps the synchronicities are THE SIGNS for you to understand that she has already reached the path parallel to yours. 

Good luck, PhiConcept.

And if it's true that these synchronicities are there for a reason,
then whatever the outcome, perhaps that's the reason.
You won't know anything
if you do nothing.

I may sound like a 14 year old with a crush, but this is damn important to me. Thanks for reading and i'll answer questions if there are any.

Well at least you don't attract girls that like you but keep saying "I have a boyfriend".

Can't wait 'til I don't attract those girls anymore

You'll never know until you act through being.  Follow your heart.

.... rather pathetic in parts but I can't help that.

"Imagine if the next love of your life told you that you couldn't still retain the endearing love that resides in your heart for your past loves; would it be love? "
~~carefulcarpenter

Love can be pathetic sometimes, until it becomes known.

Friday I walked into a music store and instantly the song Everlong (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4H0BMfqFP9c) appears on the radio there. The song reminds me of a woman i used to know and sums up my situation well. I hadn't heard it in a long time, so I went home and search through all my Foo FIghters mp3s to find the song then listen to it about twenty times over the next few days. Today I took a music quiz on facebook and the first question was 'who sings this song?' Of course the song was Everlong. Not a spectacular sync but a sync imo.

This woman A* i find on facebook, her profile is private so I can't contact her without clicking 'add to friend' or 'send a message'. Well the crux of my problem is whether I should hit that button or not.

I think I'm getting clues in the form of the synchronicity I had and the Tarot cards I'm pulling from the deck. Over the last two weeks I've pulled a crazy amount of Wheel of Fortunes and Ace of Wands. Way more than would be the average considering that there are 78 cards in the deck. I once was drunk infront of my computer and considered pulling a card while asking about A*. At first I didn't want to but then I felt i tingling sensation at the top of my head, so I drew a card and it was The Sun. Yesterday I considered clicking the 'add to friend' button and drew another card in relation to it, the card was Strength.

Here is the best description of card meanings that I've found: http://www.taroscopes.com/to_card_meanings.html It's the creation of Michael Tsarion.

Without knowing any more, would you use the information available concerning Everlong and Tarot cards to influence your decision? If I click 'add to friends' and she rejects me, knowing full well what I am asking of her, then I have gained and lost nothing. However, she rejected my advance  in 2005 and I didn't take it well at all. Something in me likes having a little bit of hope to live off, extinguish that and my life has often gone to shit.

Although she rejected me in February 2005, I was playing football with 4 friends in June at the local college and what I can only understand as her car pulled up next to the pitch for 1 minute. I recognised the car as I've seen her driving it once. At the time when she stopped, the four other people looked over to the car and not recognising who was driving the car, played on. I was about 30-40m away and could not recognise her either, so I ignored her and kept playing (which she could have seen as me rejecting her, since when she rejected me 3-4 months earlier she did it by walking straight past me when I asked to speak to her, as if i was shit on a shoe. I didn't take that well and could easily harbour a grudge against her forever for what she did and the way she did it).

I may sound like a 14 year old with a crush, but this is damn important to me. Thanks for reading and i'll answer questions if there are any.

ps she was in a relationship in Feb 2005 hence the ignominious beat down I took.