It was years ago when I was in a very dark point of my life.  I wasn't taking care of myself at all, and as a result became extremely SICK.  I mean high fever, coughing up blood sick.  And I was crashing literally on the dirty floor of one of my my "friends".

I was so feverish, I was drifting in and out of consciousness.  And at one point, I heard and felt a group of, I guess, benevolent people around me, who seemed to be deep in conversation.  As soon as I became aware of them, I heard them pause, and then I heard, "Oh!  She can hear us!  That's not good!"

A few days later I was at my mom's house slowly getting better-both physically and spiritually.  But I think those voices were maybe my spirit guides, or at least someone genuinely concerned about me.  And maybe I was closer to death than I thought  I was.  I've honestly never been that sick in my entire life.  Maybe I was poking a hole between realms.  I'm not sure, but it's what I suspect.

12 jul 07
Woke up at 3am CST with the distinct impression I must get up immediately.  So I did. What I was dreaming I do not remember. 

Interestingly. My little friend a quarter of the way around the world... had a most interesting dream and woke up the same time I did with the thought that he should get up immediately.  He remembers his dream, though I will not be posting it.

Close to a new moon though, hey.  Lots of action on its way.

I have to say though, Castaneda is incorrect in many of his understandings.  At least from my experiences.  Though this brings up a good point for me and I am sure soon, after I have read more of his work, I will be offering an alternative thesis to some of his assertions.

Several of the items in what you have quoted, I agree with.  However, there are some fundamental differences that now I can see he must have based a good deal of his beliefs on older texts that we now know were interpreted incorrectly during the times of say Crowley and himself.

That is not to say that his work (what I have read so far) is not without merit, there are just some things that strongly disagree with some of his statements, both in history, magic and in my own personal experience and in the experience of several others I have come across.

The above quote, for example... his understanding of ancient sorcerors as he likes to call them, is incorrect in my research and experience...it's a common thing to understand this incorrectly and very easy to do, especially today. 

I must agree with this statement though, I am familiar with something in my experiences that can be called an 'emissary' of sorts, or a 'guide'... though to me it is not 'alien'... it is another dimensional aspect .. or we could say a different state of being or a different demensional being or energy.  I think labelling this as something not to listen to is a bad deal...however, I am going only from my own experiences and relation of those experiences to others is the crux of my issue lately...as everyone experiences things so differently and I am still working on - not really 'fitting' my views and knowledge in with something.... more like coming to a place where I can more identify and communicate to others about it without misunderstanding.  Which is a huge issue in itself.

I also though, seem not to be able to agree that this 'emissary' is of the regular dream world, nor even of the astral dream world (if we can call them worlds)

I think that what he calls emissary and what I know is an emissary in my personal experience are two different things.  My emissaries are not a part of the regular or astral dreamtime in my experience.  And possibly here it is all about semantics but more than that, I think he used a poor word choice.  The thing he seems to be speaking of does indeed fit into the description that GenSek offered of their experiences....seems more closely related...as in the 'nonesense' and etc.

I think now, that what I am hearing...and I usually only hear this type of thing in dreams that do not seem to be mine, as I am not affected by the collective consciousness as much as many because of my magi energies, that it may not exactly be a remote dream manipulation (because though I am lucid, I do not even try to control anything or change anything, because I find the entire scenarios laughable, as they are not mine...or so I keep having the thought while I am going through it). 

I think these particular military related and 'mission' related dreams are actually something someone else is going through and that that person is the one being used as a tool or a controller or whatever we would like to call them.  I have a general term that I have used for years and that is a shell.  But I seem to be finding several descriptions of what I call a shell being split up into several categories.  And that, too, is where much of my confusion in relating and also gaining more, new ideas/information, lies.

Thanks for all of that, Montalk.  I will be working on a general thesis-type paper to illustrate more indepth and to cite other sources for what I am asserting about Castaneda, as I do have a basis for them.

Just wondering about how you know those "police" voices talk about you.

My reasoning is because ah... I can hear it in the dream and so far in my dreams I am the only female...so I just figured. 

Though no one does not make sense in the dreams.  I mean... like your example, no one makes "nonsense" statements...they all make sense in that they are complete and constructive sentences though, I am not always sure what they are talking about.

Interesting about the urgency you describe.  I never get the idea that they don't have time to relay a message. In fact it seems like they don't realize/know/think I can hear them.  Like...I will hear people talking about me in dreams as if I am eavesdropping.  Sometimes I have dreams people are holding meetings in my house and that I am sleeping and wake up (in the dream) and can hear them downstairs.

I did have one though...I dreamt of a woman who turned around and looked at me and "said" (lips didn't move, just came in my mind or whatever) Tell Her, this message.  And I thought..."who?"...and it said a friend of mine's name. But there was no 'message' except that that was the message.  Who I saw and the fact that I saw her was the message itself. Near as we can figure anyway.

Yeah you know... I'm sure there are people that think I'm off in left field as well...but most of the time this stuff means something and then a real event takes place.  But I still am trying to figure out the mechanics behind it...because I don't "try" to do this...this is just stuff that happens and sometimes it's not cool...bad things happen.  So I figure if I can learn what it may be or is and how it is working then maybe I can do something about it or at least know what to do...if anything.

Montalk... hey thanks for all that....I am about to go p/u a friend from the airport so I will have to read all that later. 

If what you are hearing is not the emissary, not just dreamtime hallucinations from the subconscious or cross-talk from the astral realms, then another possibility is that you have become conscious of remote dream manipulation. Not sure exactly how it works, but one example would be military abductees being given hypnotic verbal commands through implants as they sleep, where the spoken script turns directly into an engineered dream for mind programming purposes. What you said about these dreams having a militia-feel and often containing authority figures reminded me of that possibility. The programmers get confused when you don't follow the script.

A diffirent experience that I often have is when I hear someone talking to me and the messages usually seem very profound and/ or extreme urgency and significance, as if the speaker or speakers are limited in the amount of time they have to relay the message to me. I usually hear those when I try doing astral projections. The messages sometimes instruct me to remember the steps I took to get to the point of astral projection because, according to the speaker, it will make it much easier for me next time to get to the same place and will give them the opportunity to communicate to me. One of the strangest messages I got was: The humans believe they came from Cassiopeans, when in fact they are still there and never left. I don't know, it might be just our minds playing tricks on us, but those experiences surely seem very real to me.

I was looking at myself in a mirror, I was naked at least at the torso (could not see the rest of me in the mirror) and my breasts were much smaller and they each had two nipples.  I remember thinking, "Well...it's cool that they are smaller, but wth is up with the extra nips?"  Then I noticed that my chest did not seem real.  That is, there were wrinkles and almost like a plastic-like nature to what I was seeing.

ha ha this is the strangest dream I have ever had.  So I am figuring it must have something to do with what is happening to me....in my mind I associate breasts with womanhood, nurturing, feeding a baby.  And in the dream they are smaller, much smaller...almost gone...plus they have extra erm "feeding" appliances (lmao - sorry...have to laugh).. so I take this to mean that too much is glomming onto me and I'm running out of fuel to feed it all and there are more 'things' or events feeding than usual. BUT it all looked plastic and fake.  Once I realized and thought "hey, this looks fake"... I woke up...so I'm thinking possibly it means that I should keep doing what I am doing because I must be finally being able to cut off the 'food' and the 'food' is trying to make me think I'm losing my energy or that something is wrong with me, i.e...less of a woman, etc.

huh.

I think I think too much   Time to go for a walk in the sun!

This is the thing it would be good to get input on.  I have had several dreams that seem not to be mine, people are in it going through emotions that I do not have, that is...events that happen in the dream scare them, but not me.  Events will affect them but not me as well such as...walking through a dried up river bed...I will be walking...others are screaming and being taken down river.

Then there is this other interesing aspect that keeps happening.  Disembodied voices are talking about me in these dreams.  Not to me.  But talking as if they are on a CB Radio or something.  Some of the phrases I hear are:

Why isn't the storm affecting her?
You can't let her cross there, why can't we stop her?
Somethings wrong, we have to change, where did she come from?
Things are not as they should be, how did she get here?

Now... I understand a bit how these phrases can sound.  I mean.. you know.. ego or whatever.  Uh but no... I don't think I'm all "special"  these phrases and the dreams they are in are highly irregular for me and it all started when I ended up in a friendship with someone whom I am currently trying to sever all ties to... phsysical and non-physical.  These dreams have a very heavy militia or 'quest' type feel to them... there are a lot of what society general thinks of as authority figures, such as police, coast guard, firefighters, etc.

In all of them the person I have this 'friendship' with compells me to follow.. or at least that is what I do.  In the dreams I laugh a lot because I find the seriousness and gravity in people's faces does not always match what is happening, and again, nothing that affects them really affects me.  Plus all the other people seem to think I should not be there...or are very concerned that I am.

I don't know.  All I know is it is a new and crazy phenomenon for me at the moment and if anyone has heard of or experiences something very similar to let me know.