I do apologize if I have been condescending in any way, I often come across misunderstood.

I don't think you've been condescending at all, no need to apologize.   In fact, if anybody here has mastered the art of condescending, it's me!       So don't even be tryna steal my thunder in that area!!!    haha

Okay, fair enough.  I wasn't sure at first where you were coming from, but I think now we understand. 

I think that's a shame regarding the heretical label that some organized factions of Christianity, including Catholicism, impose upon their members.    It's a form of control on their part, a form of "thought police."  They want to make sure their members don't leave, and use any tactic possible to ensure this.   If you so much as even look at alternate material you're labeled a sinner.   Through guilt and shame they keep their members in the controlled sheep pen.   There's nothing wrong with information -  information is just information, and if a religion was truly secure with itself it would happily encourage its members to research other areas.  But deep down these religions are terrified of their members leaving in droves.   So, they impose thought-police fascist controls as preventive measures.   I hope you don't fall for that;  it seems like you are indeed aware, and are taking the solitary path away from the organized aspect of Christian teachings.   If you've found a way to practice what makes you comfortable, without having to deal with that, then good for you.     I hope the path that you've found gives you personal peace. 

I don't think you shook anybody up;  we're a pretty weird bunch here at NR, the fringe of the fringe.   

Best of luck to you.  It sounds like you've found your niche and what will make you happy.   I don't think you need to close the door on NR forever though.  We discuss many topics here, not just paranormal / aliens / conspiracy.   Keep us in mind if you ever feel like discussing something that interests you.  You're bound to find other people here who would want to discuss these things with you.

I was only briefly a posting member (back in late Jan, early Feb).

I do remember some worthwhile interactions.

I do apologize if I have been condescending in any way, I often come across misunderstood.

The reason I came back on board for one final post, was to relay that I have given up in this type of forum/research.  I have been active in the field of paranormal/supernatural/ufo/et/alien/conspiracy/religious/spiritual studies since exiting military service in 1991, and have finally reached a point where I feel no longer the need to research or interact/discuss.

I will of course keep a few trusted books (as reminders and refreshers).

I am in a hard place.  On the one hand, I am shunned by the fundamentalist Christians (for even going into these studies), and considered heretical.  I don't like organized religion much, though I am sure it serves a good place for many who share similar beliefs (and comradery).  I have read some of the Essenes (where the word 'essence' came from?) and Gnostics, which would put me in the category of 'heretic', and I sometimes feel like a heathen (the Christian teachings I have learned and try to practice have lifted me out of this feeling, mostly).  In the book, 'Christ Among Us' (a Catholic book), on page 27, it says-- "Some will feel closer to God when alone, perhaps when out amid nature's wonders, when listening to music, and so on." --I am one of these.

I did post a flurry of observations in Jan/Feb, some now on reflection, obscured, non-lucid (remember, I have mental illness which is a challenge).  Sorry if I shook anyone up too much, or pressed any buttons.  I was merely trying to relate my findings (ever evolving).

I thought it worthwhile (as some may or may not see) to post one final message here to wrap up my time (not always online) spent in these varied studies (field).

So it is with the goal of understanding (at the end of a 'quest') that I leave.

May all who seek, find.
-cloudkeen/indigo

What I am trying to say with "Christ is the only path which saves and leads to the heavens..."

I meant to say I have discovered it is the only path for me (that I have concluded).  It is a path which leads to where I want to go (to join others there waiting for me, the angels, saints, and departed spirits).

Now, I know some would say, there is no such place, or it's part of the all inclusive 'matrix'.

I have come to find that in this forum, there are few christians (and that yes, people are entrenched already in their present belief structures, including me and my re-discovered one of Christianity).

There are so many paths which deceive (many of the so-called new age, pagan/heathen, anti-christian doctrines/teachings).  Some would say, I am on a deceptive path (Christ, a so-called archetypal myth).

I disagree.

That's why I got rid of thousands of dollars worth of books I no longer agree with and discovered they were leading me away from salvation and a benevolent afterlife.

That is why I am leaving this forum.  I am tired of the whole ufo/et/alien/conspiracy/new age/pagan/heathen/agnostic/etc discussions, an obsession I indulged in an wasted much time in for many years... I told my Inupiat friend years ago, there will come a time when one does not need to keep searching and reading many books, when one can get rid of all the books and be free of searching in vain, a time when one can lighten the load, move on.  Travel light and fast, with ocassional slowness (I am kinda slow, its a blessing).

You think Christians are narrow minded, well so be it.  I am not trying to convert, only share what I have discovered on a long road trip and over the course of the last decade and a half of searching.  It could be said that you are also narrow minded in your developed views.  That is why I mentioned tolerance and sharing.  We can agree on some things.  I will stand up for my new found faith.  There are so many paths which lead one astray.  I no longer want to waste time discussing such things.  I have found the path that will help me, may you find yours.

Good hunting,
-indigo

Hey, indigo, I know how you feel.  More and more I get the feeling that a lot of this stuff is *DISTRACTION DISTRACTION DISTRACTION*, but I'm so addicted to information that I read up on this fantastic stuff.  I don't really think it's going to lead me anywhere, however, as it really has no real application in my life or any evidence of happening.  I like to hear people's interpretations of their reality, how they react to these interpretations, pick up on the common threads through all experiences, but the things I walk away with are philosophy, a different perspective that helps me see things more clearly from my own.  I don't buy that new age helps somebody become more enlightened, because I just see the same old negative behavior in different guises.  It all comes down to a personal journey, and everything else is just window dressing.  No point to argue over what's art and what isn't, same with your beliefs.  It's a personal choice, and should be respected as so.  I can't begin to count how many times people with alternative beliefs have complained that the normal, everyday person doesn't take the time to listen, but then turns around and does the same thing to somebody else, so I hope you don't take the negativity here so personal.  We are still all slaves, no matter how pretty our chains are to ourselves.

That is why I am leaving this forum.

But you've barely been involved to begin with, disappeared, then came back after a long absence.  So basically you came back.....just to leave.    That's kind of weird! 

If you're truly no longer interested in being a member of this forum then why bother coming back from your absense at all?  I mean, if you were *truly* not interested in being here.    Unless it was for some "last hurrah" or personal reason...?   Being pushed around by the new moon energies?  I don't know.   Just seems strange.

Tired of it........you were never an active member to begin with.  !   You barely posted anything, then disappeared.   

I'm just questioning why you came back when you did, after barely being an active member, only to say that you're quitting and "tired" of all the alien / conspiracy talk when you weren't even actively involved in these discussions and never around to begin with.   

It is a moon period after all.  A new moon no less.  So, something for everybody to keep in mind in case this spins wildly out of control.............!

I meant to say I have discovered it is the only path for me (that I have concluded).  It is a path which leads to where I want to go (to join others there waiting for me, the angels, saints, and departed spirits).

Now, I know some would say, there is no such place, or it's part of the all inclusive 'matrix'.

I have come to find that in this forum, there are few christians (and that yes, people are entrenched already in their present belief structures, including me and my re-discovered one of Christianity).

There are so many paths which deceive (many of the so-called new age, pagan/heathen, anti-christian doctrines/teachings).  Some would say, I am on a deceptive path (Christ, a so-called archetypal myth).

I disagree.

That's why I got rid of thousands of dollars worth of books I no longer agree with and discovered they were leading me away from salvation and a benevolent afterlife.

That is why I am leaving this forum.  I am tired of the whole ufo/et/alien/conspiracy/new age/pagan/heathen/agnostic/etc discussions, an obsession I indulged in an wasted much time in for many years... I told my Inupiat friend years ago, there will come a time when one does not need to keep searching and reading many books, when one can get rid of all the books and be free of searching in vain, a time when one can lighten the load, move on.  Travel light and fast, with ocassional slowness (I am kinda slow, its a blessing).

You think Christians are narrow minded, well so be it.  I am not trying to convert, only share what I have discovered on a long road trip and over the course of the last decade and a half of searching.  It could be said that you are also narrow minded in your developed views.  That is why I mentioned tolerance and sharing.  We can agree on some things.  I will stand up for my new found faith.  There are so many paths which lead one astray.  I no longer want to waste time discussing such things.  I have found the path that will help me, may you find yours.

Good hunting,
-indigo

I do believe the 'myth' of Jesus and many other myths are indeed symbolic, the purpose of which is to integrate into our being (individuation, archetypes; meditations on metaphor, form and vibration; transcendental consciousness, Christ or Buddha Consciousness; etc...). I will discuss one such process of integration later. I would like to state, however, that the symbolic nature of the 'savior myth' does NOT negate the actual existence of the figure. This is a hologram controled by our thoughts and emotions after all....

After many journeys I have come to the understanding that Christ saves and protects and is the only path toward the Heavens

Oh Jesus! (Hey, if nothing else, it can certainly be a great cuss word )

One thing I've noticed is that there's two types of teachings. The teachings of Christ (regardless of whether he actually was real or not), and then there's the teachings of Christians. Rarely do they seem to bear much relation to each other.

You're spouting Christian drivel indigo. But nothing you've said bears much relation to anything Christ ever said. Not that we can ever know what Christ really said anyway. Because if you think the biblical gospels are an accurate portrayal of the life and teachings of the Jesus then you may as well believe in Santa Claus.

You speak of "Confirmed Understandings" but at the end of the day that means very little. The Matrix can quite easily 'confirm' anything it wants us to believe.

The fact that you said "I have come to the understanding that Christ saves and protects and is the only path toward the Heavens" shows that the only person here that's become entrenched in a belief structure is yourself. Don't you see that? Well of course not, because people firmly entrenched in belief structures never think that they are. Strange that.

I was trying to convey my newly confirmed understandings (without dogedly attempting to convert), my change of heart.

I understand it is difficult to teach some new found belief (which came about through experience and reflection) when those being spoken to have not had similar or perceived experiences.

I do convey that one can learn through direct experience and the subsequent reflection.

It is rather hard to convey to someone already entrenched and firm in their belief structure(s).

Peace and Hope, sincerely good wishes to all, -cloudkeen (indigo)

So what if there were other savior figures of which Christ resembles?  Maybe Jesus Christ came to fulfill the role of savior for real this time, while the others were merely attempts or fabrication to mislead people into believing- well you see, there were these other mythic archetype/saviors and they were merely inventions and never occured-so do don't believe the real thing when it comes along... ???  Intentional falsehoods to deceive people when the real one genuine Savior-Christ appears on the world stage.

One more point in regards to an actual Jesus Christ, why are there  numerous ancient paintings depicting strange aerial discoid objects in the background (one such object appears in a painting entitled 'The Crucifixion' from the 13th or 14th century)? I'll tell you, because there was a real miracle performing teacher and savior who really did manifest in our timelines to fulfill a genuine role(s).  There are time-travellers who have gone back in time to witness these events.  Heck, they follow me around everywhere I go to try and understand what they are dealing with, and the how's and why's that there are saints/avatars/holy people....on earth today (and in the old days as well).  Techno time travellers observing spiritual time travellers.  Everything is being recorded and studied in higher or parallel dimensions.  I answer to the ultimate records- the Akashic Record Halls (where all my deeds/actions/efforts/struggles are reviewed/shown/studied).  It is my understanding that a man known as Jesus Christ really did exist and perform miracles (miracles which could partly be explained if one knew that Christ had help from the trans-dimensionals/helpers- the angels (some et's? too?)).

I know many street people can seem very outrageous and loony with their over-zealousness, but what if they are ranting and raving because they strongly feel they are correct?  That the evildoers will be punished and held accountable someday.  That if they can save just one person, it will have been worth their efforts.

I used to subscribe to the view that Christ was an invention of the rich to give out false hope to the poor and suffering (you can't have a good life this time, but wait, you will be rewarded in the next life-heaven, always the next life, never this one --is something Icke was trying to relate, and I understand his new age stance-- it's better to be a hedonist and enjoy your present life, since that is all there possibly is... or rather make the best of this life --I understand his stance and he has a valid point, yet I attest that there are rewards for suffering and strugglings and good works and good words in the next life --a heavenly dimension of benevolence among other prior saints and former/present angels/spirits).

I am trying to relay the point that (after my own experiences and perception) Christ did exist and will continue to exist and play a valid/genuine role in humanity's course and future.

I do understand that there are many other avatars out there (Buddha, for example, and the prophet Mohammed), but I still understand that there is one narrow way to salvation, and that is understanding and practicing the teachings of Christ which are difficult yet attainable teachings-- faith (not blind faith, but a leap of faith), hope, charity, forgiving, non-violence, compassion for the poor and sick and struggling and meek, and unconditional love.  I used to believe there were numerous paths to God (the Great Holy Spirit), maybe one can find their way by following other avatars like Buddha, or Mohammed or Native American teachings.... I am merely saying that from my personal experience (after studying other paths) that Christ seems to be the one true path.

edit: some grammar corrections

Abayo! (Luck!)
--indigo

So I would like to make this the seventh (a better number) reply.

On the nature of God.

I remember in some of my readings (Angels-an Endangered Species by Malcolm Godwin) that the Gnostics taught that certain religions (including Judeo-Christian) worship the wrong God, and that Jesus Christ was incorporeal (not literal, which I do not agree with), and that matter was inherently evil (which I also disagree with). Interesting heretical premises (from the more fundamentalist stances).

Maybe the fanatics (violent zealots) worship the wrong side or nature of God (The Great Spirit, or however one defines God with a capital G).  Carrying out violent acts which they believe serve a higher purpose.  Can God be both good and evil?  Or is there many gods (with lower g's) and one or two main Gods, one God-a merciful, benevolent, forgiving, just one, while the other a violent, wrathful, unforgiving one? Or is it duality (as the Star Wars mythos, to name one modern-day mythic invention, Light and Dark sides, good and evil?).

Is it like Iluvatar (a Tolkien invention) who created the Ainur, Valar, Maiar, Elves, Men, Hobbits?

With Melkor (Morgoth) the rebel Valar (Angel), and Sauron (his lieutenant).

Iluvatar representing the good (gud) God, and Morgoth representing Satan (Lucifer).

Extended metaphors (allegory) could be argued.

Are the Essenes any more accurate?  Are the Gnostics truly claiming heresy?

Not to mention all the other varied sects and cults... Christian or otherwise...

Do the Muslems and Judaic peoples (not to mention the Catholics and Protestants in Ireland and the US/UK) all worship the wrong God (Satan in the guise of a god?), or simply God's darker side?

I would like to think that Jesus Christ was the one true Son of God and that his teachings will lead us out of darkness (the tenets of tolerance, peace, compassion, virtues-faith, hope, charity, love, unconditional love...).

I truly now more firmly understand that the Christ Force or Presence is Real and Just.

After many journeys I have come to the understanding that Christ saves and protects and is the only path toward the Heavens (the only path that overcomes the seven deadly sins and other sins so numerable in our world of Earth today).  It is said there are many heavens (some even fake Satanic heavens and dimensions).  I don't know about you, but I would like to make it to a benevolent and good domain in the long run.  Like an old movie I watched one night on TCM tv channel, where the old man and his dog chat with an angel at the gates of heaven only to find out that his dog was right in barking and alerting him about that feeling that was just sorta off, maybe this is the wrong gate?  Later he finds a benevolent angel who tells him-- it's good you did not enter that gate... that was the gate to Hell.

So with that said (and to all whose religion is not Christian), I hope and pray there will be peace and tolerance no matter what particular faith you conform to (Pagan, Native American, Atheist, Agnostic, Judaic, Islamic, Hindu, Buddhist, Heathen, whatever) that you find what you are looking for in the long run (the long way home, or short if you're lucky).

-cloudkeen, indigo

Zonabi:  I am fine at the moment with what cd's I have.  I really got rid of a lot of the old dark/gothic ones... I feel more liberated from them now.

Kathy:  I understand what you are saying about giving up t.v.

It is something I could never do.

I am a dreamer, I find release in it.  I have a lavender/magenta aura/personality (dreamer).

Movies and music bring me joy and vicarious escape (by projecting myself into the hero's role in a movie).  I can find romance, action, comedy, compassion, strange new places/locales, etc...

There are worse addictions...

As far as staying here and posting or continued interplay, I had a difficult time just considering posting what I already have (my final follow up).

I want to get away from the whole new age, paranormal, speculation, spirituality subjects.

I will spend my future time saving up money (to travel far and wide on), reading plain spiritual books (no more paranormal), writing in my journals, someday again more poetry writing, watching t.v. and movies, listening to soothing music, surfing the internet (mostly reference), and maybe a few other activities....

I went to a concert for the first time (for about three years) the other night, Keane, a British soft-rock band.  I actually teared up in a couple songs (about romantic relationships).

I am not comfortable in the body I reside in.  I will never overcome dysmorphia (my body was young and healthy, and lean once upon a time).  I am not good at relationships (friends or girlfriends), I suppose I am too self-absorbed.  I WILL someday find my true love (on the other side, I feel she is waiting and watching there for me).

I will try to shirk the whole saintly/angelic mission/message kinda thing as best I can.

It IS who I FEEL myself to be, I will merely put it in the back of my mind and try to maintain a modesty about it.

If someone were to examine the entire context of my life so far, they would be truly astonished (as I am), yet, we must all face our demons and hang-ups.  Confront and overcome our dark/shadow sides and let the Light of Christ shine thru and cleanse us.

edit: some grammar corrections and I forgot to thank Ladyvixen for her input...