Topic: Awakening
I don't know how else to describe what happens to me when I can reach certain focused meditative states other then awakening, or opening my third eye. I am not sure what is happening and I get too freaked out to ever go to deep into them, but today I had another one at a large meeting at work of all places. These experiences are similar to what I experienced on Ayahausca when I was down on Brazil except I can shut these experiences off almost instantly. Why do I shut the experience off? Well, this experience is fresh enough in my mind that I can remember what I thought I knew when I went through the veil.
I have been trying to focus as of recently as I know that I can become so much more effective at doing the things in my life if I could just focus more. So the past few days I have been doing some meditation of various sorts, basically practicing spacing off where you become unaware of your environment with your eyes open type of thing. So today I am at this meeting with about 100 people and a guy op on the stage of the auditorium lecturing to us about the state of the company. I had planned on writing down some of my theories on reality during the meeting so I didn't have to listen to the corporate BS for 1.5 hrs, but a friend of mine sat down next to me so I decided I shouldn't go writing my "crazy" ideas down lest he take notice of them and turn me into the company Psyche department. So instead I decided to pretend like I was watching the presenter, but instead practice some more eye open meditation. So from there I am not sure how the events proceeded but after a while I noticed my focus was pretty tight and I was entering an altered state. At some point further along I am still staring at the presenter, and all the sudden I connect with something and all of these memories come flooding back to me, and I suddenly see all the people staring blankly at the presenter as zombies totally deceived like in a 1984 type scenario and I realized that a lot of those books, 1984, a brave new world, Farenhieght 451 weren't warning us about how things might become but how they are. I could "see" what I usually see as the Archon/Lizzie figure that I see as this neon cartoonish creature that is drawn out of jagged triangular shapes. The archon appeared to be looking at the meeting as if the subjagation of creative minds was going as according to plan. At this moment I got a big smile, I think because it was dead clear to me how this is all a game, and the Lizzies are just really good at it. Right now we are duped, and trying to awake. There was no animosity. There is no death, only deception of the mind and they are doing a damn good job on us. Now I can't really tell how clear this message came through and how much I have distorted things from this experience. But the thing about this state is just the intensity of the memories coming through, as to a point I know something very powerful is happening, so much so that it freaks me out to the point where I shut it right off. I can never bring through very much of what I see from that state though. And I doubt what I saw very quickly as the power and clarity of the experience begin to fade.
Another interesting thing I keep seeing when I see the lizzies is they are always demonstrating this flashing strobing effect that is very similar to how things would look if everything were constructed from a vegas strobing light set. Another thing that reminds me of it was a Nova documentary that I saw on Cuttle fish, I have included a link that shows a quick overview of the cuttlefish. If you watch the video notice how right before the cuttle fish pounces on its prey its whole skin begins to strobe. This is exactly the same effect I see when I see what I can only guess are something similar to the Archons. My whole vision of them is pulsing in the same manner. I can only assume they are trying to hypnotize me back under, to confuse and distract me back into unawareness, back with the muggles, insert me back into the matrix.
http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/preview/i_3404.html
Which brings the story to another tangent, an interesting synchronisity. One day my friend sends me a link for a new search engine. "What am I going to search for I wonder". "Burnadette" pops into my head. I have no clue where it came from or if I had ever heard of it before. So I search burnadette, and follow the first link that drew my attention. Up pops the quote.
To gain that which is worth having, it may be necessary to lose everything else.
I found this very interesting because it addresses directly why I shut down the third eye or awakening process when it happens. I am scared that I may lose everything. What is on the other side? What is through that door? What if I lose my mind, my life, everything? So that quote is given to me out of random, as a little hint maybe.